Bird Flu vs Swine Flu

Health food makes me sick. - Calvin Trillin

No doctor is better than three. - German Proverb

Pain will leave you, when you let go. - Jeremy Aldana

The bird a nest, the spider a web, man friendship. - William Blake

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer. - Joan Rivers

No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings. - William Blake

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

If you ignore your health for long enough, it'll go away. - Unknown

How much pain have cost us the evils that have never happened. - Thomas Jefferson

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir. - Thomas Fuller

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. - Steven Wright

Confucius say: "Man who want pretty nurse, must be patient." - Unknown

Humor does not diminish the pain - it makes the space around it get bigger. - Allen Klein

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

I recently became a Christian Scientist. It was the only health plan I could afford. - Betsy Salkind

The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley

But we have to pass the [health care] bill so that you can find out what's in it. - Nancy Pelosi

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get. - Robert Orben

Having insurance doesn't guarantee good health outcomes, but it is a critical factor. - Irwin Redlener

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright

My own prescription for health is less paperwork and more running barefoot through the grass. - Leslie Grimutter

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles

We could not understand that there was anything about a bird that could not be built on a larger scale. - Orville Wright

Give a man health and a course to steer, and he'll never stop to trouble about whether he's happy or not. - George Bernard Shaw

When wealth is lost, nothing is lost. When health is lost, something is lost. When character is lost, all is lost. - Rev. Billy Graham

Just like a shoe, if someone is meant for you, they will fit just perfectly. No forcing, no struggling, and no pain. - Unknown

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland

Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden

You end up as you deserve. In old age you must put up with the face, the friends, the health, and the children you have earned. - Fay Weldon

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

Do something everyday that you don't want to do. This is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain. - Mark Twain

A male frigate bird blows up a wild red pouch on his neck. He can keep it puffed up for hours. It is his way of impressing the girls. - Julie Murphy

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright