Texas 4 Months Apart

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted. - Mae West

Floods and diseases and pestillentaries - Archie Bunker

Climate is what we expect. Weather is what we get. - Mark Twain

The New Year begins in a snow-storm of white vows. - George William Curtis

Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq. - Fran Lebowitz

I'm super laid back. I'm from Texas. I love my family. - Selena Gomez

It is best to read the weather forecasts before we pray for rain. - Mark Twain

In Texas it's always hot, dry, sunny, not a cloud in the sky. - Piper Perabo

The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.' - Kinky Friedman

Jon Snow: I'm not afraid to die.
Mormont: Nor life, I hope. - George R.R. Martin

Conversation about the weather is the last refuge of the unimaginative. - Oscar Wilde

She walked across the ballroom as if she were trudging through deep snow. - Noel Coward

You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans. - George Carlin

We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas. - Red Skelton

As soon go kindle fire with snow, as seek to quench the fire of love with words. - William Shakespeare

Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may. - Sam Houston

I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining. - Groucho Marx

If a man's from Texas, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him by asking? - John Gunther

Some folks look at me and see a certain swagger, which in Texas is called 'walking.' - George W. Bush

Let's get an extended weather forecast from a jittery, inconsistent, reddish brown rodent. - Unknown

There's one good thing about snow: it makes your lawn look as nice as your neighbor's. - Clyde Moore

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

It's not my fault I was dragged out of my house by a mob and forced to predict the weather. - Punxsutawney Phil

I'm from Texas, and one of the reasons I like Texas is because there's no one in control. - Willie Nelson

Bond reflected that good Americans were fine people and that most of them seemed to come from Texas. - Ian Fleming

When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry

Be careful not to complain about anything, even the weather, since I am the Author of your circumstances. - Sarah Young

Advice is like snow, the softer it falls the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into the mind. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain. - Robert Frost

The Eskimos had fifty-two names for snow because it was important to them: there ought to be as many for love. - Margaret Atwood

You can take the girl out of Texas but not the Texas out of the girl and ultimately not the girl out of Texas. - Janine Turner

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

A mighty fortress is our God,
A bulwark never failing;
Our helper He,
amid the flood of mortal ills prevailing. - Martin Luther

Life is no different than the weather. Not only is it unpredictable, but it shows us a new perspective of the world every day. - Suzy Kassem

Don't knock the weather. Nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while. - Kin Hubbard

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind. - Leonardo da Vinci

Ring out the old, ring in the new,
Ring, happy bells, across the snow:
The year is going, let him go;
Ring out the false, ring in the true. - Lord Alfred Tennyson

If you want to surf, move to Hawaii. If you like to shop, move to New York. If you like acting and Hollywood, move to California. But if you like college football, move to Texas. - Ricky Williams

An Irishman will always soften bad news, so that a major coronary is no more than 'a bad turn' and a near hurricane that leaves thousands homeless is 'good drying weather'. - Hugh Leonard