Novocaine Feeling

Birth patrol pills. - Archie Bunker

I told you I was sick. - B.P. Roberts

Sickness soaks the purse. - International Proverb

Gangrene: To be feeling sick - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Every disease is a physician. - Irish Proverb

Medicine is the best medicine. - Doctors Anonymous

Diabetes taught me discipline. - Sonia Sotomayor

Laughter is the best medicine. - Joe-kster

One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb

The best medicine is having a good wife. - Kin Hubbard

No medicine cures what happiness cannot. - Gabriel G Marquez

Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick. - George Burns

Fashion saves a lot more lives than doctors. - Bruno Gehard

Better a lucky physician than a learned one. - English Proverb

When fate arrives the physician becomes a fool. - Arabic proverb

Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine. - Lord Byron

False Doctrine: Giving people the wrong medicine - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

When I first found out I had diabetes I denied it. - Nell Carter

Why do the best doctors have the sickest patients? - Unknown

One should only see a psychiatrist out of boredom. - Muriel Spark

Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher

Somebody must get the incompetent lawyers and doctors. - George Bernard Shaw

The best cure for sea sickness, is to sit under a tree. - Spike Milligan

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb

I have friends struggling with autism, juvenile diabetes. - Nicole A. Parker

I bet giraffes don't even know what farts smell like. - Bill Murray

I'm never sick. Why get sick? It's a waste of time. - Martha Stewart

If we become ill, modern medicine can work healing miracles. - Joseph B Wirthlin

Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it. - Ovid

Psychiatrist: an M.D. who can't stand the sight of blood. - Unknown

Document: Repeating what your Doctor told you in your own words - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Be kind to your dentist because he has "fillings" too. - Unknown

Cavity: Empty space ready to be stuffed with dentist's bills. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Medicine is only for those who cannot imagine doing anything else. - Luanda Grazette

She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon. - Groucho Marx

NyQuil on the rocks, for when you're feeling sick but sociable. - Mitch Hedberg

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. - Rodney Dangerfield

We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist. - Joseph Heller

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick - not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen

Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker

To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

Barium: 1. What Doctors do when treatment fails; 2. What you do when CPR fails. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I wanted to study to be a dental hygienist, marry a rich dentist, and hang it up. - Vicki Lawrence

I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for. - James H. Boren

Poisons and medicine are oftentimes the same substance given with different intents. - Peter Mere Latham

Grave: A place in which the dead are laid to await the coming of the medical student - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin

The grinding of the intellect is for most people as painful as a dentist's drill. - Leonard Woolf

If suffering brought wisdom, the dentist's office would be full of luminous ideas. - Mason Cooley

Virus is a Latin word used by doctors to mean 'your guess is as good as mine'. - Bob Hope

Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings. - Laurence J Peter

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman

Physiology is the stepchild of medicine. That is why Cinderella often turns out the queen. - Martin H. Fischer

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright

Coaching doesn't make sick people well - it helps healthy people become extra-ordinary. - Thomas Leonard

I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne

Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket. - Ambrose Bierce

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient, whilst Mother Nature takes care of the cure. - Voltaire

I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning. - Phyllis Diller

Diabetes is a great example whereby, giving the patient the tools, you can manage yourself very well. - Clayton Christensen

My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more. - Walter Matthau

Many people find themselves with illness as they become successful: higher blood pressure and diabetes. - Zong Qinghou

I've always been independent. I've always had courage. But I didn't always own my diabetes. - Mary Tyler Moore

The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain

The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too. - Rodney Dangerfield

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor. - Abe Lemons

If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov

Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine

My heart, which is so full to overflowing, has often been solaced and refreshed by music when sick and weary. - Martin Luther

Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather

I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet. - Rodney Dangerfield

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

I was diagnosed with diabetes at age 18. I didn't know what it was, so I went to the library and looked it up. - Ron Santo

I chalk up the fact that I got diabetes to my body saying, 'Dude, you have been doing wrong for way too long!' - Randy Jackson

The only weapon with which the unconscious patient can immediately retaliate upon the incompetent surgeon is hemorrhage. - William Stewart Halsted

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle

To the person with a toothache, even if the world is tottering, there is nothing more important than a visit to a dentist. - George Bernard Shaw

NASA scientists have been studying giraffe skin so they can apply what they learn from it to the construction of spacesuits. - Joanna Lumley

I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin

Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown

Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles

A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer

I do not love to work out, but if I stick to exercising every day and put the right things in my mouth, then my diabetes just stays in check. - Halle Berry

The physician should look upon the patient as a besieged city and try to rescue him with every means that art and science place at his command. - Alexander of Tralles

If I could store lightnings in jars, I'd sell them to sick fireflies to light their way. Only they have nothing to pay for it with but life. - Will Advise

Nurse: 1. A woman whose business is to make sickness a pleasure; 2. A young women who holds your wrist and then expects your pulse to be normal. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com