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Home is the nicest word there is. - Laura I Wilder

Ideal Guest: One who stays at home - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Homemade dishes drive one from home. - Thomas Hood

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

For most of history, Anonymous was a woman. - Virginia Woolf

In the ant's house, the dew is a flood. - Danish Proverb

Heaven is home. Utopia is here. Nirvana is now. - Edward Abbey

He'd go through the house like Typhoon Mary. - Archie Bunker

A man thinks he knows, but a woman knows better. - Indian Proverb

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. - Irina Dunn

We can dance on pinheads till the cows come home. - Alastair Campbell

The words you speak become the house you live in. - Hafiz

When a woman is openly bad she is then at her best. - Latin Proverb

A woman can keep one secret - the secret of her age. - Voltaire

Jade: A semi-precious stone or a semi-precious woman - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Home is an invention on which no one has yet improved. - Ann Douglas

I just heard from Bill Bailey. He's not coming home. - Henny Youngman

A weeping man and a smiling woman are not to be trusted. - Indian Proverb

I represent the 'Wonder Woman' of the new world. - Gal Gadot

Home is not where you live but where they understand you. - Christian Morgenstern

A woman's best protection is a little money of her own. - Clare B Luce

I can't clean house and save the world at the same time. - Unknown

My first day as a woman and I am already having hot flushes. - Robin Williams

If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything. - Marilyn Monroe

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke. - Groucho Marx

If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one. - Andrew A. Rooney

Nothing spoils a romance so much as a sense of humor in the woman. - Oscar Wilde

Go often to the house of a friend, for weeds choke the unused path. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

That's the best part of going away for a vacation - coming home again. - Madeleine L'Engle

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in. - Robert Frost

Italy is the home of art and swindling; home of religion and moral rottenness. - Mark Twain

Observe your dog: if he's fat, then you're not getting enough exercise. - Evan Esar

My vigour, vitality, and cheek repel me. I am the kind of woman I would run from. - Nancy Astor

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house unless they have a well-stocked bar. - WC Fields

I love contemporary art, although I wouldn't want a pickled shark in my house. - Bruno Tonioli

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping. - Bo Derek

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home. - Bill Cosby

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

I'm the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night... and reduce the crime rate. - Phyllis Diller

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be made at me for saying that. - Mitch Hedberg

Be grateful for the home you have, knowing that at this moment, all you have is all you need. - Sarah B Breathnach

Liberate yourself today. At work or at home - you don't have to be how others expect you to be. - Elaine Harrison

I would venture to guess that Anon, who wrote so many poems without signing them, was often a woman. - Virginia Woolf

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

In France we leave unmolested those who set fire to the house, and persecute those who sound the alarm. - Sebastien Chamfort

Everything is for sale in Hollywood; the fairy tale, the costume, the pumpkin, the footman and the mice. - Amanda Eliasch

Sex between a man and a woman can be wonderful, provided you get between the right man and the right woman. - Woody Allen

One of television's great contributions is that it brought murder back into the home, where it belongs. - Alfred Hitchcock

My cell phone is acting up - I keep pressing the home button but when I look around, I'm still at work. - Unknown

Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going. - Phyllis Diller

There goes a woman who knows all the things that can be taught and none of the things that cannot be taught. - Coco Chanel

I wanted to be the first woman to burn her bra, but it would have taken the fire department four days to put it out. - Dolly Parton

When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

My house is on the median strip of a highway. You don't really notice, except I have to leave the driveway doing 60 MPH. - Steven Wright

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you. - Ogden Nash

Over the years, I learned so much from mom. She taught me about the importance of home and history and family and tradition. - Martha Stewart

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

I think being a woman is like being Irish. Everyone says you're important and nice, but you take second place all the same. - Iris Murdoch

One need not be a chamber to be haunted;
One need not be a house;
The brain has corridors surpassing
Material place. - Emily Dickinson

The worst thing about work in the house or home is that whatever you do it is destroyed, laid waste or eaten within twenty-four hours. - Lady Hasluck

Now I lay facedown on the bed, sobbing for the woman who once slept here not knowing that someday one of her worst fears would come true. - Jennifer Castle

When a woman puts on a heel, she has a different posture, a different attitude. She really stands up and has a consciousness of her body. - Christian Louboutin

Some keep the Sabbath going to Church
I keep it, staying at Home
With a Bobolink for a Chorister
And an Orchard for a Dome - Emily Dickinson

Never play cards with a man called Doc, never eat at a place called Mom's, and never sleep with a woman whose troubles are worse than your own. - Nelson Algren