#1 humor site on the 'net

Hobbit Tree House

My precious!

Hobbit Tree House thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
Friendship is a sheltering tree. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

A little axe can cut down a big tree. - Jamaican Saying

My family tree could use some pruning. - Unknown

The apple will fall under the apple tree. - Greek Proverb

The trees that are slow to grow bear the best fruit. - Moliere

If you hate where you are, move - you are not a tree. - Unknown

The best cure for sea sickness, is to sit under a tree. - Spike Milligan

By trying often, the monkey learns to jump from the tree. - Cameroon Proverb

Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit. - Kahlil Gibran

Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit. - Khalil Gibran

I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree. - Joyce Kilmer

When you think about a walking tree, laughter is the response. - John Rhys-Davies

Zealotry: 1. The enemy of idealism; 2. What a tree salesman likes to do. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The trees in Siberia are miles apart - that's why the dogs are so fast. - Bob Hope

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now. - Chinese Proverb

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap. - Fred Allen

Each has his own tree of ancestors, but at the top of all sits Probably Arboreal. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Someone told me I was immature. Guess who's not allowed in my tree house now? - Unknown

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

Trees are not known by their leaves, nor even by their blossoms, but by their fruits. - Eleanor of Aquitaine

Someone's sitting in the shade today because someone planted a tree a long time ago. - Warren Buffett

Transplanting the ballet to the United States is like trying to raise a palm tree in Dakota. - Lincoln Kirsten

Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree. - Martin Luther

The stars are like the trees in the forest, alive and breathing. And they're watching me. - Haruki Murakami

If I had six hours to chop down a tree, I'd spend the first four hours sharpening the axe. - Abraham Lincoln

The difference between a gun and a tree is a difference of tempo. The tree explodes every spring. - Ezra Pound

We breathe air, trees make air, homework kills trees, therefore homework is going to kill us all. - Unknown

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

The reason there are so many tree-lined boulevards in Paris is so the German army can march in the shade. - George S Patton

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

Climb the mountains and get their good tidings. Nature's peace will flow into you as sunshine flows into trees. - John Muir

Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. - Abraham Lincoln

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland

As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. - Woody Allen

I think trees should bloom earlier in the spring. They act like they are on a schedule. It’s not like they have anywhere to go. - Jarod Kintz

On the top of the Crumpetty Tree
The Quangle Wangle sat,
But his face you could not see,
On account of his Beaver Hat. - Edward Lear

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

Love is like the wild-rose briar, friendship like the holly-tree. The holly is dark when the rose-briar blooms, but which will bloom most constantly? - Emily Bronte


Water Waste Basket

My Daughter and My Money

Executive Decision Time

Animal Rings

Cow Return

Biggest Fan On The Block

Senior's TV Tray

Potty 'Train'ing In India

A Woman Named Five Horses

Vegan Dentist

How To Conserve Gas

Rolling Shoes

How Twins Are Made

Cool Reading Room

Poor Lifetime

Be GarFul

Tooth Ferry

Ready For Rabbits

Ecosystem

Plumber's Night Light

Can I Lick The Bowl

Redneck Shelves

Google Classic

In Touch Today