#1 humor site on the 'net

Fish Injuries

Omega-3 fish oil supplements for superficial heart disease

Fish Injuries thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid

No medicine cures what happiness cannot. - Gabriel G Marquez

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

Why is it we never get our bad medicine in small doses? - Edmund H North

Be patient and calm; no one can catch a fish with anger. - Herbert Hoover

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain. - Mark Twain

My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes

I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett

I don't really get romance. Bring me fish or moose, not flowers. - Eden Robinson

Save one life, you're a hero. Save 100 lives, you're a nurse. - Unknown

The last mosquito that bit me had to check into the Betty Ford clinic. - Joanna Lumley

I do believe that laughter is the best medicine - it cures everything. - Radhika Apte

Govern a great nation as you would cook a small fish. Do not overdo it. - Lao Tzu

Joy is more divine than sorrow, for joy is bread and sorrow is medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

Fish die belly upward, and rise to the surface. Its their way of falling. - Andre Gide

The best way to reduce the cost of medical care is to reduce the illness. - Arlen Specter

A hypochondriac is one who has a pill for everything except what ails him. - Mignon McLaughlin

Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham

Don't be a fish; be a frog. Swim in the water and jump when you hit ground. - Kim Young-ha

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

A man's health can be judged by which he takes two at a time - pills or stairs. - Joan Welsh

I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for. - James H. Boren

Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold

When they see me holding fish, they can see that I am comfortable with kings as well as with paupers. - Imelda Marcos

Give a man a fish and you have fed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you have fed him for a lifetime. - Chinese Proverb

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor. - Abe Lemons

It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish. - Mark Twain

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

The Pentagon still has not given a name to the Iraqi war. Somehow 'Operation Re-elect Bush' doesn't seem to be popular. - Jay Leno

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it was stupid. - Albert Einstein

Too many young folk have an addiction to superficial things and not enough conviction for substantial things like justice, truth and love. - Cornel West

I see God in every human being. When I wash the leper's wounds, I feel I am nursing the Lord himself. Is it not a beautiful experience? - Mother Teresa

My Doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. I drink too much. Way too much. My doctor drew blood. He ran a tab. - Rodney Dangerfield


Irish Flu Shots

Snake Circle

Romantic Accident

Winter Mirror

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Abbey Road Joe-kster and Bernie

Straws

Chernobyl Fish

Hard Working Cop

Mechanic's Work Table

Canadian Tennis

Swimsuit Police

Waiting For The Perfect Man

Dutch Cowboy

Ship Tow

Fish Walk

Paradigm Shift

Spanish Stairs

TyrannoSnowRus Rex

Hawaii Surfing

Should Have Pulled Out

Leonardo da Vinci's Unfinished Portrait

Cooking For Guys

One Sushi Is Enough