#1 humor site on the 'net

Clever Chinese

Sea if you can find them hiding in plane site

Clever Chinese thanks to William Ng

QuotaBills
Too clever is dumb. - Ogden Nash

No news is good news. - Ludovic Halevy

Literature is news that stays news. - Ezra Pound

None loves the messenger who brings bad news. - Sophocles

All new news is old news happening to new people. - Malcolm Muggeridge

China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese. - Charles de Gaulle

I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27. - Clement Attlee

When the news is scary, you should look for the helpers. - Fred Rogers

A clever person solves a problem. A wise person avoids it. - Albert Einstein

Gossip is just news running ahead of itself in a red satin dress. - Liz Smith

The Republic of China - back in the Olympic Games for the first time. - David Coleman

How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? - Jay Leno

Marriage, like a submarine, is only safe if you get all the way inside. - Frank Pittman

Lord Birkenhead is very clever but sometimes his brains go to his head. - Margot Asquith

The good-news stories in medicine are early detection, early intervention. - Thomas R Insel

For most folks, no news is good news; for the press, good news is not news. - Gloria Borger

No Chinese Catholics are allowed to worship ancestors in their familial temples. - Pope Clement XI

First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin

Yoga has a sly, clever way of short circuiting the mental patterns that cause anxiety. - Baxter Bell

To be clever enough to get a great deal of money, one must be stupid enough to want it. - George Bernard Shaw

It is better to be making the news than taking it; to be an actor rather than a critic. - Winston Churchill

I just wasn't cut out to be a Chinese Tiger Mom. I'm more of an Irish Setter Dad. - P.J. O'Rourke

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

Education without values, as useful as it is, seems rather to make man a more clever devil. - C S Lewis

Like a bull into a china closet. Like in that picture, "The Prince and The Porpoise." - Archie Bunker

In the beginning was the Lie and the Lie was made news and dwelt among us, graceless and false. - Malcolm Muggeridge

The everyday kindness of the back roads more than makes up for the acts of greed in the headlines. - Charles Kuralt

All my life I've wanted, just once, to say something clever without losing my train of thought. - Robert Breault

You can tell whether a man is clever by his answers. You can tell whether a man is wise by his questions. - Naguib Mahfouz

I had a meal last night. I ordered everything in French - surprised everybody, it was a Chinese restaurant. - Tommy Cooper

One of the lessons of history is that nothing is often a good thing to do and always a clever thing to say. - Will Durant

Evening news is where they begin with "Good evening", and then proceed to tell you why it isn't. - Unknown

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

Why don't you put that in the headline: "He Only Did Three With Doris!" Set a lot of people straight. - Rock Hudson

It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. - Jerry Seinfeld

Living in China has made me appreciate my own country, with its tiny, ethnically diverse population of unassuming donut-eaters. - Jan Wong

I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era when so many things were going so right for so many of the wrong persons. - Ogden Nash

Oil prices have fallen lately. We include this news for the benefit of gas stations, which otherwise wouldn't learn of it for six months. - Bill Tammeus

When written in Chinese, the word "crisis" is composed of two characters. One represents danger, and the other represents opportunity. - John F Kennedy

NBC News just called it "The Great Freeze" - coldest weather in years. Is our country still spending money on the global warming hoax? - Donald Trump


Be GarFul

Tooth Ferry

Ready For Rabbits

Ecosystem

Plumber's Night Light

Can I Lick The Bowl

Redneck Shelves

Google Classic

In Touch Today

Delicious Grief

Amplified Beer

How to Twerk at Work

$383.00 Paint Job

Wine Time Finally

Scooter Hearse

Thailand Ferry

Hard Hat Safety

Water Coolant

Spray-On Clothing

Bright Bookshelf

Saddle Surprise

Politicians Be Like

Senior Aerobics

Foiled Again