QuotaBillsSave water - drink vodka. - Unknown
Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling
I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King
Adventure is the champagne of life. - G K Chesterton
Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder. - Addison Mizner
Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster
You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker
I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn
Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb
We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown
Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson
Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown
I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown
Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown
When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields
Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson
Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman
As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields
There was a sound in their voices which suggested rum. - Robert Louis Sevenson
Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting? - WC Fields
Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson
If God forbade drinking, would He have made wine so good? - Cardinal Richelieu
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin
It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst
Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley
Stop trying to make everybody happy - you're not tequila. - Unknown
Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits
I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill
Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. - Benjamin Franklin
I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy. - Frank Sinatra
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin
If one glass of wine is good for you, just imagine what a whole bottle could do! - Unknown
Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx
Jameson's Irish Whiskey really does improve with age: the older I get the more I like it. - Bob Monkhouse
Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz
There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid
Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin
It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie
I have made an important discovery - that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication. - Oscar Wilde
A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke
In those days the best painkiller was ice. It wasn't addictive, and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. - George Burns
When I have an idea, I turn down the flame, as if it were a little alcohol stove, as low as it will go. Then it explodes and that is my idea. - Ernest Hemingway
NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown