#1 humor site on the 'net

Nail Polish for Dogs

When girls do their nails

Nail Polish for Dogs thanks to Howard Chapman

QuotaBills
Dogs have masters. Cats have staff. - Unknown

In youth and beauty wisdom is rare. - Homer

The pain passes, but the beauty remains. - Pierre-August Renoir

I always say that beauty is only sin deep. - Saki

Dairymaid: A girl who ought to know butter - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You can't teach a young dog old tricks. - Warren Buffett

The more I see of men, the more I like dogs. - Madame de Stael

If you want the girl next door, go next door. - Joan Crawford

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Wok The Dog: Specialty at Vietnamese Restaurants - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers

Life and joy and beauty are better than dusty death. - Bertrand Russell

Beauty in things lies in the mind which contemplates them. - David Hume

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. - Andy Rooney

What a strange illusion to suppose that beauty is goodness. - Leo Tolstoy

The truth isn't always beauty, but the hunger for it is. - Nadine Gordimer

Natural beauty takes at least two hours in front of a mirror. - Pamela Anderson

I knew a girl so ugly, they use her in prisons to cure sex offenders. - Rodney Dangerfield

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

Carpenter: 1. A guy who nails down his agreement; 2. A shelf made man. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

Think of all the beauty that's still left in and around you and be happy! - Anne Frank

Competence, like truth, beauty and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder. - Laurence J Peter

Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother willing to let him have one. - Unknown

I am obsessed with Costco. I love the salmon and rotisserie chicken, the dog beds. - Kris Jenner

When other little girls wanted to be ballet dancers, I kind of wanted to be a vampire. - Angelina Jolie

Anyone who keeps the ability to see beauty in every age of life really never grows old. - Franz Kafka

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

Somehow a bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever. - Helen Rowland

Flops are a part of life's menu and I've never been a girl to miss out on any of the courses. - Rosalind Russell

Beauty and ugliness disappear equally under the wrinkles of age; one is lost in them, the other hidden. - Jonathan P Senn

Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring. - Marilyn Monroe

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

Kissing power is stronger than will power: Girls need to 'prove their love' like a moose needs a hat rack. - Abigail VanBuren

A girl phoned me the other day and said, "Come on over, nobody's home." I went over. Nobody was home. - Rodney Dangerfield

My girlfriend's dog died. So I got her an identical one. She was livid; 'What am I going to do with two dead dogs?' - Gary Delaney

I don't care how many beauty treatments you have, I don't care which bag you're carrying - you have to have a dress. - Vivienne Westwood

Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul. - John Muir

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker

Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who make you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat. - Joanne Woodward


Time Of Day

Waiting Is Good

Solar Charging

Submergible

Fast Closure

Penalty Shot

Redneck Date

Non-Hot Dog

Unattended Children

Open Goal Forgiveness

Double Your Vision

How To Become A Pirate

He Did It

HorseBack Riding

Business School Basics

Restored Beauty

Lion On Stilts

Before 12 Beers

Lizard Hairstyle

Join Me For A Swim

French Ikea

Handicap Ramp

Redneck Repair Kit

Progress Bar