Lampstand Driver

Afford: Popular type of car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Safety doesn't happen by accident. - Unknown

Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

Care shouldn't start in the emergency room. - James Douglas

Substance is not enough, accident is also required. - Greek Proverb

Stardom isn't a profession, it's an accident. - Lauren Bacall

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

Giving never happens by accident. It's always intentional. - Amy Grant

Police Station: A place where sleeping is all right in a pinch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. - Ambrose Bierce

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

It is a lot harder now to be a police officer than what it used to be. - Steven Seagal

Happiness is an accident of nature, a beautiful and flawless aberration. - Pat Conroy

I aimed at the public's heart and by accident I hit it in the stomach. - Upton Sinclair

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

The toilets at a local police station have been stolen. Police say they have nothing to go on. - Ronnie Corbett

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

The police feel that most of the public are against them and that there is a lot of bad feeling. - Peter James

A police force, wherever they are, is made up of amazing people, and I respect them a great deal. - Nancy McKeon

The greatest pleasure I know is to do a good action by stealth, and to have it found out by accident. - Charles Lamb

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting. - Ronald Reagan

I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife. - Ilie Nastase

Do you think you're safe in a car with your seatbelt on? Dream on. My friend thought so. Now she's pregnant. - Anke Engelke

It's a sad day when you find out that it's not accident or fortune but just yourself that kept things from you. - Lillian Hellman

I'm being kidnapped by a comforter, sheet and pillow. No need to call the police for I will be released by morning. - Unknown

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

I think our police are excellent, probably because I have not done anything that has occasioned being beaten up by these good men. - Clement Freud

Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket, or a holding pattern over Philadelphia. - Judith Viorst

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz