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Lampstand Driver

Walking away from the scene of the crime

Lampstand Driver thanks to Colleen Huko

QuotaBills
Fjord: Norwegian car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Safety doesn't happen by accident. - Unknown

Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident. - Mark Twain

Care shouldn't start in the emergency room. - James Douglas

Never invest emergency savings in the stock market. - Suze Orman

Substance is not enough, accident is also required. - Greek Proverb

The police are recruited from the criminal classes. - Gore Vidal

Stardom isn't a profession, it's an accident. - Lauren Bacall

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Giving never happens by accident. It's always intentional. - Amy Grant

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

The police are not here to create disorder, they;re here to preserve disorder. - Richard J Daley

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? - George Carlin

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend. - Jack Nicholson

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson

Faith is a fine invention
When Gentlemen can see -
But Microscopes are prudent
In an Emergency. - Emily Dickinson

I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife. - Ilie Nastase

Do you think you're safe in a car with your seatbelt on? Dream on. My friend thought so. Now she's pregnant. - Anke Engelke

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

I'm being kidnapped by a comforter, sheet and pillow. No need to call the police for I will be released by morning. - Unknown

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

I think our police are excellent, probably because I have not done anything that has occasioned being beaten up by these good men. - Clement Freud

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

The best way to meet a woman is in an emergency situation - if you're in a shipwreck, or you find yourself behind enemy lines, or in a flood. - Mark Helprin

Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do. - Pele


Trudeau's Top Fails

Bathtub Opulence

Anger Release Machine

Inbread Cat

Madness in London

Crotch Rocket

Too Late Sign

Smart Car Security

Motorcycle Texting

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Fresh Out Of The Saddle

Monsoon TV

Radio Shack Closes Down

DIRK

Karate Sign Kick

Evel Knievel Tickets

LiverPool

Romanian Barbeque

Mexican Starfish

On Top Of Things

Beer Chess

The Art of Cropping

Copycat Pilot

Hungry For Justice