Lampstand Driver

Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Police do not belong in war zones. - Daniel K Moran

The police must obey the law while enforcing the law. - Earl Warren

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Giving never happens by accident. It's always intentional. - Amy Grant

Police Station: A place where sleeping is all right in a pinch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. - Ambrose Bierce

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

It is a lot harder now to be a police officer than what it used to be. - Steven Seagal

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

I aimed at the public's heart and by accident I hit it in the stomach. - Upton Sinclair

Sleeping is my drug; my bed is my dealer; and my alarm clock is the police. - Unknown

It is sometimes as dangerous to be run into by a microbe as by a trolley car. - J.J. Walsh

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

There is nothing so strong or safe in an emergency of life as the simple truth. - Charles Dickens

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? - George Carlin

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room. - David Lehman

The toilets at a local police station have been stolen. Police say they have nothing to go on. - Ronnie Corbett

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

A police force, wherever they are, is made up of amazing people, and I respect them a great deal. - Nancy McKeon

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

The greatest pleasure I know is to do a good action by stealth, and to have it found out by accident. - Charles Lamb

Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock

Faith is a fine invention
When Gentlemen can see -
But Microscopes are prudent
In an Emergency. - Emily Dickinson

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

It's a sad day when you find out that it's not accident or fortune but just yourself that kept things from you. - Lillian Hellman

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman

The best way to meet a woman is in an emergency situation - if you're in a shipwreck, or you find yourself behind enemy lines, or in a flood. - Mark Helprin