Jail Sale

An old man in a house is a good sign. - Benjamin Franklin

To a warden Utopia is an escape-proof jail. - Mark Twain

The most anxious man in a prison is the warden. - George Bernard Shaw

Be thine own palace, or the world's thy jail. - John Donne

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. - Steven Wright

Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind. - Terry Pratchett

We must interpret a bad temper as a sign of inferiority. - Alfred Adler

How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign? - George Carlin

In my country we go to prison first and then become president. - Nelson Mandela

I don't want to send them to jail. I want to send them to school. - Adlai Stevenson

A great many people think that polysyllables are a sign of intelligence. - Barbara Walters

My wife's an earth sign. I'm a water sign. Together we make mud. - Henny Youngman

There should be no bank too big to fail but no individual too big to jail. - Hillary Clinton

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

Bargain Sale: A place where a woman can ruin one dress while she buys another - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

To be satisfied with yourself is a sure sign that your forward motion has stopped. - Unknown

Please don't come to my garage sale if you've ever let me borrow something. - Mike Spears

When a man falls into his anecdotage, it is a sign for him to retire from the world. - Benjamin Disraeli

The world itself is but a large prison, out of which some are daily led to execution. - Sir Walter Raleigh

I used to think that one of the great signs of security was the ability to just walk away. - Jack Nicholson

You will never be free until you free yourself from the prison of your own false thoughts. - Unknown

If you are discouraged it is a sign of pride, because it shows you trust in your own powers. - Mother Teresa

No matter how old a mother is, she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement. - Florida Scott-Maxwell

Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison. - Unknown

It is when we notice the dirt that God is most present in us; it is the very sign of His presence. - C S Lewis

If the sign on your heart says, "WELCOME", the love will come pouring in from everywhere. - Susan Jeffers

I got all the schooling any actress needs. That is, I learned to write well enough to sign contracts. - Hermione Gingold

I saw a sign: "Rest Area 25 Miles". That's pretty big. Some people must be really tired. - Steven Wright

A cement mixer has collided with a prison van. Motorists are asked to look out for 16 hardened criminals. - Ronnie Corbett

My parents live in a retirement community, which is basically a minimum-security prison with a golf course. - Joel Warshaw

It's a sign of age if you feel like the morning after the night before and you haven't been anywhere. - Unknown

Too often, sales reps simply regurgitate their presentations and expect to land the sale. It doesn't work. - Harvey Mackay

Crying doesn't indicate that you are weak. Ever since you were born it's been a sign that you are alive. - Unknown

Pain is a sign that we are alive. Problems are a sign that we are strong. Prayer is a sign that we are not alone. - Unknown

Who is apt, on occasion, to assign a multitude of reasons when one will do? This is a sure sign of weakness in argument. - Harriet Martineau

I glanced out the window at the signs of spring. The sky was almost blue, the trees were almost budding, the sun was almost bright. - Millard Kaufman

A man’s life is interesting primarily when he has failed – I well know. For it’s a sign that he tried to surpass himself. - Georges Clemenceau

When one may pay out over two million dollars to presidential and Congressional campaigns, the U.S. government is virtually up for sale. - John W. Gardner

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller

Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list. - Yakov Smirnoff