#1 humor site on the 'net

Imaginary Boyfriend

Is he a square root?

Imaginary Boyfriend thanks to Howard Chapman

QuotaBills
Math research is more like a marathon. - Terence Tao

How to turn your ex-boyfriend into a toad. - Athena Starwoman

Square Root: 1. Diced carrot; 2. Diced turnip. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I am putting real plums into an imaginary cake. - Mary McCarthy

I was the kid next door's imaginary friend. - Emo Philips

Pure mathematics is the poetry of logical ideas. - Albert Einstein

Algebra: Undergarment worn by female math teachers - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Pure mathematics, may it never be of any use to anyone. - Henry Smith

Politics is for the present, but an equation is for eternity. - Albert Einstein

The only thin a boyfriend was good for was a shattered heart. - Becca Fitzpatrick

"Obvious" is the most dangerous word in mathematics. - Eric T. Bell

Science is a differential equation. Religion is a boundary condition. - Alan Turing

Save a boyfriend for a rainy day. And another, in case it doesn't rain. - Mae West

I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away. - Phyllis Diller

Drum soloing is like doing a marathon and solving equations at the same time. - Neil Peart

Life is good for only two things: discovering mathematics and teaching mathematics. - Simeon Poisson

Let us grant that the pursuit of mathematics is a divine madness of the human spirit. - Alfred Whitehead

I like to crack the jokes now and again, but it's only because I struggle with math. - Tina Fey

Real difficulties can be overcome; it is only the imaginary ones that are unconquerable. - Theodore N Vail

Nothing changes the gender equation more significantly than women's economic freedom. - Gloria Steinem

Do not worry about your difficulties in mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater. - Albert Einstein

Ronald Reagan knew who he was. Barack Obama is still working through that equation politically. - Joe Scarborough

I must study politics and war that my sons may have the liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. - John Adams

Write about what really interests you, whether it is real things or imaginary things, and nothing else. - C S Lewis

Some men storm imaginary Alps all their lives, and die in the foothills cursing difficulties which do not exist. - Edgar W Howe

Mathematics may be compared to a mill of exquisite workmanship, which grinds your stuff to any degree of fineness. - Thomas Huxley

The most painful thing about mathematics is how far away you are from being able to use it after you have learned it. - James Newman

Mathematics is like checkers in being suitable for the young, not too difficult, amusing, and without peril to the state. - Plato

Mathematics is indeed dangerous in that it absorbs students to such a degree that it dulls their senses to everything else. - Prinz zu Hohlenlohe-Ingelfingen Kraft

Understand the key factors in the math behind viral marketing, and use those to figure out what it takes to get viral growth. - David Skok

A formal manipulator in mathematics often experiences the discomforting feeling that his pencil surpasses him in intelligence. - Howard Eves

Amazingly when you add life and consciousness to the equation you can actually explain some of the biggest puzzles of science. - Robert Lanza

Many training programs and often schools focus on just a skill or a kind of work competency. That's only half the equation. - Gerald Chertavian

Mathematics may be defined as the subject in which we never know what we are talking about, nor whether what we are saying is true. - Rene Descartes

You can't be afraid of getting old. Old is good, if you're gathering in life. Our band is good at understanding that equation. - Bruce Springsteen

As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality. - Albert Einstein

Mathematics is not a careful march down a well-cleared highway, but a journey into a strange wilderness where the explorers often get lost. - W.S. Anglin

Imagining what a character will do in a given situation - it's like an equation, and working it out is a marathon rather than a sprint. - Callum Turner

I tell them that if they will occupy themselves with the study of mathematics they will find it the best remedy against the lusts of the flesh. - Thomas Mann

Mathematics began to seem too much like puzzle solving. Physics is puzzle solving, too, but of puzzles created by nature, not by the mind of man. - Maria G. Mayer


Deer Hunter Tattoo

Nope, Didn't See A Thing

Man Sues Wife Over Make-Up

Down Under Bronco Riding For Kids

Re-Ewes Me

It's A Keeper

Plankstanders

Millionaire Women

Laptop Cooler

Scan Scam

Motorcycle Taxi

I've Got Time

Clangeroo

Redneck Cooler

Instead Of Flowers

Mt. Rushmore from the Canadian Side

I Love Summer

Karma Towing

Salmon-chanted Evening

Hands On Tree

Fart Facts

New Medicare Program for Senior Citizens

Down Under Bat

Muffler Hanger