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If Alcohol Talked

Bartender terminology - booze jargon drinkers need to know

If Alcohol Talked thanks to Keith Blake

If Alcohol Talked thanks to Keith Blake

If Alcohol Talked thanks to Keith Blake

If Alcohol Talked thanks to Keith Blake

If Alcohol Talked thanks to Keith Blake

If Alcohol Talked thanks to Keith Blake

If Alcohol Talked thanks to Keith Blake

If Alcohol Talked thanks to Keith Blake

Discussions with the bottle once you've had too much to drink

QuotaBills
Wine is bottled poetry. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

In wine, there is the truth. - Pliny the Elder

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

Wine is my favorite 4 letter word. - Unknown

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb

We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown

Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin

When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields

Talking to you is like casting pearls into wine. - Archie Bunker

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman

As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson

It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst

God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson

One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. - Samuel Johnson

Why is it that everybody's suing the tobacco companies and not the alcohol companies? - Donald Trump

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz

You pretty much can't get away from bacon or whiskey in the South. Put a doughnut in it and you'd be good to go. - Hillary Scott

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown

When I have an idea, I turn down the flame, as if it were a little alcohol stove, as low as it will go. Then it explodes and that is my idea. - Ernest Hemingway

Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor


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