Family Affair

A happy family is but an earlier heaven. - Sir John Bowring

The family is the nucleus of civilization. - William Durant

There's no such thing as fun for the whole family. - Jerry Seinfeld

Besmooch the family name in the eyes of the community. - Archie Bunker

I would give everything if I could only keep my family. - Johnny Depp

I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap. - Rodney Dangerfield

Dishtemper: What family members suffer from after dinner - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women. - WC Fields

Making the family a top priority will invariably bring success. - Zig Ziglar

Remember as far as anyone knows, we're a nice normal family. - Homer Simpson

Other things may change us, but we start and end with the family. - Anthony Brandt

Live so you won't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip. - Will Rogers

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap. - Fred Allen

If you're Irish, it doesn't matter where you go - you'll find family. - Victoria Smurfit

Southerners are so devoted to genealogy that we see a family tree under every bush. - Florence King

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

He that has no fools, knaves, nor beggars in his family was begot by a flash of lightning. - Thomas Fuller

I only hope when I have my own family that every day I see a little more of my father in me. - Keith Urban

I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married. - Lewis Grizzard

HonkoSecond: The time between the light turning green and the sound from the car horn behind you - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

I grew up in an Irish Catholic family, and I think they force you to watch every James Cagney movie. - Jimmy Fallon

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

Mothers are like glue, Even when you can't see them, they're still holding the family together. - Susan Gale

I don't think he's gonna come Edith. He just ain't got none of that, waddya call, family unconscious. - Archie Bunker

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

Her capacity for family affection is extraordinary: when her third husband died, her hair turned quite gold from grief. - Oscar Wilde

Over the years, I learned so much from mom. She taught me about the importance of home and history and family and tradition. - Martha Stewart

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

The average family spends 30 hours in front of a television, and they say they don't have the time to have a balanced, integrated life. - Stephen Covey

In a big family the first child is kind of like the first pancake. If it's not perfect, that's okay, there are a lot more coming along. - Antonin Scalia

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

I have frequently been questioned, especially by women, of how I could reconcile family life with a scientific career. Well, it has not been easy. - Marie Curie

Relations are simply a tedious pack of people, who haven't got the remotest knowledge of how to live, nor the smallest instinct about when to die. - Oscar Wilde