Christmas Babies

Newborn Baby: Fresh heir - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Every child begins the world again. - Henry David Thoreau

A child is a curly dimpled lunatic. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Unclaimed Baby Sheep: No man's lamb - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It takes a whole village to raise a child. - African Proverb

It takes an entire village to raise a child. - African Proverb

Brat: A child who displays his pest manners. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

One hour with a child is like a ten-mile run. - Joan B. Samuelson

Titillate: A tardy meal for a breast-fed baby - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Infancy conforms to nobody; all conform to it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

De-caffeinated: What a cow gets when it has a baby - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Bison: What you say when your child leaves for school - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

For when a child is born the mother also is born again. - Gilbert Parker

Man's main task in life is to give birth to himself. - Erich Fromm

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on. - Joan Rivers

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

If our American way of life fails the child, it fails us all. - Pearl S. Buck

I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan

The only thing worth stealing is a kiss from a sleeping child. - Joe Houldsworth

If pregnancy were a book, they would cut the last two chapters. - Nora Ephron

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. - Leo J Burke

Baby Boomer: A kid who just polished off six jars of raspberry jam - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Every child needs a father. Even if he turns out to be Darth Vader. - Jackson Radcliffe

Experience is the child of thought, and thought is the child of action. - Benjamin Disraeli

As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula. - Dave Barry

If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have peace. - Thomas Paine

A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five. - Groucho Marx

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby. - Natalie Wood

Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard

There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A characteristic of the normal child is he doesn't act that way very often. - Unknown

Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born? - Benny Hill

Who is more foolish, the child afraid of the dark or the man afraid of the light? - Maurice Freehill

The most effective form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids. - Jill Bensley

The most important question in the world is, "Why is the child crying?" - Alice Walker

Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up. - Pablo Picasso

The firsts go away - first love, first baby, first kiss. You have to create new ones. - Sarah Jessica Parker

Kidnap: 1. Something that a young child takes when tired; 2. When a baby goat sleeps. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

If newborn babies could speak they would be the most intelligent beings on planet earth. - Jaden Smith

A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children. - Dave Barry

Feedback: The inevitable result when your baby doesn’t appreciate the strained carrots - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When you teach a child something, you take away forever his chance of discovering it for himself. - Jean Piaget

I was such an ugly baby. My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend. - Rodney Dangerfield

One thing I had learned from watching chimpanzees with their infants is that having a child should be fun. - Jane Goodall

A certificate of live birth is not the same thing by any stretch of the imagination as a birth certificate. - Donald Trump

The legacy I want to leave is a child-care system that says no kid is going to be left alone or left unsafe. - Marian Wright Edelman

The only way we can ever teach a child to say "I'm sorry" is for him to hear it from our lips first. - Kevin Leman

Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie

There's nothing that can help you understand your beliefs more than trying to explain them to an inquisitive child. - Frank A. Clark

Every time a child says, "I don't believe in fairies," there is a little fairy somewhere that falls down dead. - Sir James M. Barrie

Any fool can have a child. That doesn't make you a father. It's the courage to raise a child that makes you a father. - Barack Obama

As an experienced artist, I carry my work like a secret pregnancy. I am always aware of inner life and the need to protect it. - Julia Cameron

He adopted a role called being a father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a protector. - Tom Wolfe

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

I was not a child prodigy, because a child prodigy is a child who knows as much when it is a child as it does when it grows up. - Will Rogers

A child can teach an adult three things: to be happy for no reason; to always be curious; and to fight tirelessly for something. - Paulo Coelho

No one ever wants to see his or her name linked to anything bad. Conscience is like a baby. It has to go to sleep before you can. - Harvey Mackay

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

I was forced to live far beyond my years when just a child, now I have reversed the order and I intend to remain young indefinitely. - Mary Pickford

I can change a diaper in 30 seconds flat. I set the new one beneath the old one. That way, it's just wipe and pull the flap over. - Drew Brees

Without this playing with fantasy no creative work has ever yet come to birth. The debt we owe to the play of the imagination is incalculable. - Carl Jung

In a big family the first child is kind of like the first pancake. If it's not perfect, that's okay, there are a lot more coming along. - Antonin Scalia

When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child. - Sophia Loren

Blessed be Providence which has given to each his toy: the doll to the child, the child to the woman, the woman to the man, the man to the devil. - Victor Hugo