America These Days

The best of America drifts to Paris. - F Scott Fitzgerald

America can't beat anyone anymore. - George Clooney

There are no American infidels in Baghdad. - Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf

Canadians are Americans with no Disneyland. - Margaret Mahy

I'm as single as a slice of American cheese. - Nick Cannon

America is a land where men govern, but women rule. - John M Brown

Teaching has ruined more American novelists than drink. - Gore Vidal

America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric. - Doug Hamwell

If our American way of life fails the child, it fails us all. - Pearl S. Buck

In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children. - Robert Benchley

No one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public. - P.T. Barnum

When God created the world, he didn't draw a line between Canada and America. - Marianne Williamson

In America nobody says you have to keep the circumstances somebody else gives you. - Amy Tan

There are two kind of air travel in the United States, first class and third world. - Bobby Slayton

America had often been discovered before Columbus, but it had always been hushed up. - Oscar Wilde

Vietnam was lost in the living rooms of America, not on the battlefields of Vietnam. - Marshall McLuhan

In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, the Party can always find you. - Yakov Smirnoff

The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it. - George Carlin

The joke was lost on the foreigner - guides cannot master the subtleties of the American joke. - Mark Twain

There are many men of principle in both parties in America, but there is no party of principle. - Alexis de Tocqueville

Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks, and hitting things with a stick. - P.J. O'Rourke

Diabetes occurs at twice the rate in the African American community as it does in white Americans. - Xavier Becerra

I don't understand American football at all. It looks like all-in wrestling with crash helmets. - Sting

I can remember when Democrats believed that it was the duty of America to fight for freedom over tyranny. - Zell Miller

I blend my green drink every morning. I also fix my son a full-on American breakfast with bacon and toast. - Liz Phair

The largest party in America is neither the Democrats nor the Republicans. It's the party of non-voters. - Robert Reich

To be President of the United States, sir, is to act as advocate for a blind, venomous, and ungrateful client. - John Updike

Bank of America is to sweetheart loans and Democratic Party payoffs as Paula Deen is to sugar and bacon grease. - Michelle Malkin

My big focus is China and OPEC and all of these countries that are just absolutely destroying the United States. - Donald Trump

Americans still believe in an America where anything's possible - they just don't think their leaders do. - Barack Obama

Half of the American people have never read a newspaper. Half never voted for President. One hopes it is the same half. - Gore Vidal

The courtrooms of America all too often have Piper Cub advocates trying to handle the controls of Boeing 747 litigation. - Warren E. Burger

Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so. - Gore Vidal

Does America really need to be the best at everything? You already dominate the world in economics, military power and obesity. - Trevor Noah

If Aliens visit us, the outcome would be much as when Columbus landed in America, which didn't turn out well for the Native Americans. - Stephen Hawking

Anyone who believes the competitive spirit in America is dead has never been in a supermarket when the cashier opens another checkout line. - Ann Landers

No one can be as calculatedly rude as the British, which amazes Americans, who do not understand studied insult and can only offer abuse as a substitute. - Paul Gallico

Canada is the essence of not being. Not English, not American, it is the mathematic of not being. And a subtle flavour - we're more like celery as a flavour. - Mike Myers

The fact is, beneath the hype, Iraqis will soon appreciate American help and idealism far more than French perfidy. It is never wrong to be on the side of freedom - never. - Victor D. Hanson

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you. - Rita Mae Brown