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Tragic Accident

Losing your best friend and drinkin' buddy

Tragic Accident thanks to Art Gauthier

Becoming un-friended after catching a finger in a wedding ring

QuotaBills
Marriage is the sunset of love. - French Proverb

Marry in haste, repent at leisure. - English Proverb

I was so cold I almost got married. - Shelley Winters

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - James Thurber

Call no man unhappy until he is married. - Socrates

I've seen better fights at a wedding. - Harry Redknapp

Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident. - Mark Twain

In married life, three is company and two none. - Oscar Wilde

An Irish wedding is a tame thing to an Irish funeral. - Mary Deasy

Second Marriage: The triumph of hope over experience. - Samuel Johnson

Veiled Threat: When your girlfriend hints at a wedding - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I've been married twice but I haven't had a marriage yet. - Jennifer Lopez

The general rule is that people who enjoy life also enjoy marriage. - Phyllis Battelle

Men are my hobby. If I ever got married, I'd have to give it up. - Mae West

There's one thing about a late marriage - it doesn't last long. - Unknown

If you have a boat and a happy marriage, you don't need another thing. - Ed McMahon

Key Ring: A handy little gadget that allows you to lose all your keys at once - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If men knew how women pass the time when they are alone, they'd never marry. - O. Henry

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. - Anne Taylor Fleming

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring. - Jeff Foxworthy

A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

I've been married to a communist and a fascist, and neither would take out the garbage. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

I believe in the institution of marriage, and I intend to keep trying until I get it right. - Richard Pryor

It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf. - Robert Lynd

My husband always felt that a marriage and career don't mix. That's why he's never worked. - Phyllis Diller

When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

I realize the tragic significance of the atom bomb. We thank God it has come to us instead of our enemies. - Harry S Truman

Grandchildren don't make a man feel old; it's the knowledge that he's married to a grandmother. - G Norman Collie

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

It's a sad day when you find out that it's not accident or fortune but just yourself that kept things from you. - Lillian Hellman

I think hearts are very much like glasses - if they do not break with the first ring, they usually last a considerable time. - Letitia Landon

In this year, King Aethelstan, Lord of Warriors, ring-giver to men... won eternal glory, in battle with sword edges, around Brunaburh. - Unknown

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage. - Robert Anderson

Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do. - Pele

One advantage of marriage is that when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again. - Judith Viorst

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you. - Helen Rowland


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