Tire Substitute

Life is too short for traffic. - Dan Bellack

Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'm tire of getting made fun of. - Geraldo Rivera

Statistics are no substitute for judgement. - Henry Clay

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

A public-opinion poll is no substitute for thought. - Warren Buffett

The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes. - Brian Mullin

Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines. - David Letterman

The Flat Earth Society has members all around the globe. - Unknown

Neurosis is always a substitute for legitimate suffering. - Carl Jung

Bedside manners are no substitute for the right diagnosis. - Alfred P. Sloan, Jr.

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men. - Frederick Douglass

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

Nothing encourages creativity like the chance to fall flat on one's face. - James D Finley

Keep your bike in good repair: motorcycle boots are not comfortable for walking. - Unknown

You can buy anything on eBay. I bought the world's oldest globe. It's flat. - Buzz Nutley

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

Hope is only a beginning; it's not a substitute for action, only a basis for it. - Rebecca Solnit

Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners. - E. Joseph Crossman

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder." - Steven Wright

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

Advertising is the modern substitute for argument; its function is to make the worse appear the better. - George Santayana

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest. - Kin Hubbard

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

The Internet is so big, so powerful and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute for life. - Andrew Brown

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

There's nothing to match curling up with a good book when there's a repair job to be done around the house. - Joe Ryan

Do you think you're safe in a car with your seatbelt on? Dream on. My friend thought so. Now she's pregnant. - Anke Engelke

The actual building of roads devoted to motor cars is not for the near future, in spite of many rumors to that effect. - Harper's Weekly

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

I can change a diaper in 30 seconds flat. I set the new one beneath the old one. That way, it's just wipe and pull the flap over. - Drew Brees