Tire Substitute

Afford: Popular type of car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is no substitute for victory. - Douglas MacArthur

A meeting is no substitute for progress. - Unknown

Power tires only those who do not have it. - Giulio Andreotti

There are no traffic jams on the extra mile. - Zig Ziglar

Traffic Ticket: Finale of the policeman's bawl - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Spare Tire: The one you check after you have a flat - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes. - Brian Mullin

The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit. - W Somerset Maugham

She died doing what she loved, taking a selfie in traffic. - Unknown

The beaten path is the safest, but the traffic's terrible. - Jeff Taylor

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

The shortest distance between two points is usually under repair. - Unknown

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic. - Dan Rather

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

You can buy anything on eBay. I bought the world's oldest globe. It's flat. - Buzz Nutley

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners. - E. Joseph Crossman

I may be a living legend, but that sure don't help when I've got to change a tire. - Roy Orbison

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

They say you only go around once, but with a muscle car you can go around two or three times. - Tim Allen

Neither smiles nor frowns, neither good intentions nor harsh words, are a substitute for strength. - John F Kennedy

Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest. - Kin Hubbard

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

The Internet is so big, so powerful and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute for life. - Andrew Brown

Giving up on your goal because of one setback is like slashing your other three tires because you got a flat. - Unknown

Poverty: 1. A state of mind sometimes induced by a neighbour's new car; 2. One thing that money can't buy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Do you think you're safe in a car with your seatbelt on? Dream on. My friend thought so. Now she's pregnant. - Anke Engelke

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 2,000 MPG. - Bill Gates

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman