#1 humor site on the 'net

Texas Rims

Ensuring car clearance in a small parking lot

Texas Rims thanks to Jess LeRacyn

Alloy wheels ensure private parking space

QuotaBills
Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The legs are the wheels of creativity. - Albert Einstein

Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

A lawyer and a cart wheel must be greased. - John R Beard

There are no traffic jams on the extra mile. - Zig Ziglar

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

Life is like a chariot wheel that ever rolls along. - Anacreon

Four wheels move the body. Two wheels move the soul. - Unknown

Life is a wheel of fortune and it's my turn to spin it. - Tupac

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Colors must fit together as pieces in a puzzle or cogs in a wheel. - Hans Hofmann

We all thought we'd have flying cars by now, but we don't. - Dana Brunetti

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic. - Dan Rather

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners. - E. Joseph Crossman

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

The wheel of change moves on, and those who were down go up, and those who were up go down. - Jawaharial Nehru

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

If I weren't skateboarding, I'd love to race cars. I like anything that's fast and active. - Ryan Sheckler

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

I'm working on a second cookbook and am working on my love story, 'Black Heels to Tractor Wheels.' - Ree Drummond

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

The actual building of roads devoted to motor cars is not for the near future, in spite of many rumors to that effect. - Harper's Weekly

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

Just think how far we've come in the 20th Century. The man who used to be a cog in the wheel is now a digit in the computer. - Robert Fuoss

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright


Corona Isolation

Cat Cookie

Worn Brakes

Apprentice Auto Body Shop

Moving Level Pro

Redneck Muffler Repair

Eggsellent Bike

Prairie Bear

Clinton Greeting

Halloween Flashers

Saying Pun

Redneck Blinds

Kid Disposal

Motorvation

Electric Football

Montgomery Ward 1934 Christmas Catalog

Halloween Lamp

Making Music Together

Back Asswards

Tent Peg Setup

Fang Treats

Model T Snowmobile

Skinny Puddy Tat

Redneck Cocktail