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Smirnoff Women

We don't serve women here - you have to bring your own

Smirnoff Women thanks to Frank Howard

QuotaBills
Women hold up half the sky. - Mao Zedong

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb

Tis brief, my lord... as woman's love. - William Shakespeare

We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown

Put the light out, and all women are alike. - German Proverb

Behind every good woman is a lot of chocolate. - Unknown

Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition. - Timothy Leary

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill

It is much easier to take care of a sackful of fleas than a woman. - German Proverb

Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more. - James Stephens

That woman speaks eighteen languages and can't say no in any of them. - Dorothy Parker

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship. - Sharon Stone

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

A woman is like a teabag. Only in hot water do you realize how strong she is. - Nancy Reagan

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby. - Natalie Wood

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction. - Oscar Wilde

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

Women are like elephants to me: nice to look at, but I wouldn't want to own one. - WC Fields

Women over thirty are at their best, but men over thirty are too old to recognize it. - Jean-Paul Belmondo

The Book of Life begins with a man and woman in a garden, and it ends with Revelations. - Oscar Wilde

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.

Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd,
Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorned. - William Congreve

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. - Erica Jong

When I invite a woman to dinner I expect her to look at my face.
That's the price she has to pay. - Groucho Marx

Democracy is very different in U.S. and A. from Kazakhstan. In America, woman can vote, but horse cannot! - Borat Sagdiyev

A woman's dress should be like a barbed-wire fence: serving its purpose without obstructing the view. - Sophia Loren

If women want any rights more than they got, why don't they just take them and not be talking about it? - Sojourner Truth

Sex between a man and a woman can be wonderful, provided you get between the right man and the right woman. - Woody Allen

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock

The scorn men express for a male who does housework is exceeded only by their aversion to a woman who doesn't. - Penny Kome

Ninety percent I'll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I'll probably waste. - Tug McGraw

I like the West. That's where men are men and women are women, and it's hard to beat a combination like that. - Milton Berle

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. - Lana Turner

Except for a few guitar chords, everything I've learned in my life that is of any value I've learned from women. - Glenn Frey

Part of the reason that men seem so much less loving than women is that men's behavior is measured with a feminine ruler. - Francesca M. Cancian

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking. - Bill Vaughan

When I have an idea, I turn down the flame, as if it were a little alcohol stove, as low as it will go. Then it explodes and that is my idea. - Ernest Hemingway


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