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Smirnoff Women

We don't serve women here - you have to bring your own

Smirnoff Women thanks to Frank Howard

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Women's word is never done. - American Proverb

The woman that deliberates is lost. - Joseph Addison

Tis brief, my lord... as woman's love. - William Shakespeare

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

Women want love to be a novel. Men, a short story. - Daphne du Maurier

A woman can keep one secret - the secret of her age. - Voltaire

Women would not be prostitutes if it were not for men. - Baroness Vickers

Temptation is a woman's weapon and man's excuse. - H L Mencken

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot. - Groucho Marx

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II

Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson

She's loaded with this, waddya call, women's intermission. - Archie Bunker

The best years of a woman's life - the ten years between 39 and 40. - Unknown

No one but a woman in love ever sees the maximum of men's greatness. - Anais Nin

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy. - Frank Sinatra

The test of a man or woman's breeding is how they behave in a quarrel. - George Bernard Shaw

I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

Blessed be Thou, our God and Lord of Hosts, who has not created me a woman. - Jewish Prayer

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. - Aristotle Onassis

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her. - WC Fields

I will buy any creme, cosmetic, or elixir from a woman with a European accent. - Erma Bombeck

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby. - Natalie Wood

One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. - Samuel Johnson

Women are like elephants to me: nice to look at, but I wouldn't want to own one. - WC Fields

No honest work of man or woman "fails"; it feeds the sum of all human action. - Michelene Wandor

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water. - Eleanor Roosevelt

I'm the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night... and reduce the crime rate. - Phyllis Diller

The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron. - Phyllis Diller

Let praise be given equally to women as well as men who have been distinguished in virtue. - Plato

Jameson's Irish Whiskey really does improve with age: the older I get the more I like it. - Bob Monkhouse

Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana

To my eye, women get sexier around 35. They know a thing or two, and knowledge is always alluring. - Pierce Brosnan

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. - Phyllis Diller

One should never trust a woman who tells her real age; a woman who would tell one would tell one anything. - Oscar Wilde

For twenty-four years I've been in love with the same woman. If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me. - Henny Youngman

Women are the most powerful magnet in the universe. And all men are cheap metal. And we all know where north is. - Larry Miller

At present, our country needs women's idealism and determination, perhaps more in politics than anywhere else. - Shirley Chisholm

Our duty, as men and women, is to proceed as if limits to our ability did not exist. We are collaborators in creation. - Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off. - Pat Paulsen

All of the women on 'The Apprentice' flirted with me - consciously or unconsciously. That's to be expected. - Donald Trump

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. - Lana Turner

I think the only difference between me and the other candidates is that I'm more honest and my women are more beautiful. - Donald Trump

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

Like many other women, I could not understand why every man who changed a diaper has felt impelled, in recent years, to write a book about it. - Barbara Ehrenreich


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