#1 humor site on the 'net

Security Camera Setup

How not to calibrate a video surveillance system

Security Camera Setup thanks to Howard Chapman

QuotaBills
The important thing is not the camera but the eye. - Alred Eisenstaedt

Protect your enthusiasm from the negativity of others. - H. Jackson Brown Jr.

There is no security in this life. There is only opportunity. - Douglas MacAurthur

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

I would uphold the law if for no other reason but to protect myself. - Thomas More

We spend our time searching for security and hate it when we get it. - John Steinbeck

The conventional view serves to protect us from the painful job of thinking. - John Kenneth Galbraith

He prefers the security of known misery to the misery of unfamiliar insecurity. - Sheldon B. Kopp

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them? - George Carlin

One should really use the camera as though tomorrow you'd be stricken blind. - Dorothea Lange

Idealism, alas, does not protect one from ignorance, dogmatism, and foolishness. - Sidney Hook

A memorandum isn't written to inform the receiver, but to protect the writer. - Dean Acheson

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

It is true greatness to have in one the frailty of a man and the security of a god. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca

I wear a fun sock when I travel to give the security staff a well-deserved chuckle. - Chelsea Peretti

Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some extent, protects you from age. - Unknown

Of all the tasks of government, the most basic is to protect its citizens from violence. - John Foster Dulles

A man's own good breeding is the best security against other people's ill manners. - Lord Chesterfield

I used to think that one of the great signs of security was the ability to just walk away. - Jack Nicholson

Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks. - Doug Larson

I do not think there is any silver bullet to solving the technology side of the security equation. - John W. Thompson

Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity. They seem to be more afraid of life than death. - James F. Bymes

You can't reach old age by another man's road. My habits protect my life but they would assassinate you. - Mark Twain

The only security men can have for their political liberty, consists in keeping their money in their own pockets. - Lysander Spooner

Lock up your libraries if you like; but there is no gate, no lock, no bolt that you can set upon the freedom of my mind. - Virginia Woolf

My heart to you is given:
Oh, do give yours to me;
We'll lock them up together,
And throw away the key. - Frederick Saunders

Enthusiasm is the best protection in any situation. Wholeheartedness is contagious. Give yourself if you wish to get others. - David Seabury

Every street in London has a camera, and if you ever travel up the M4, it feels as if George Orwell should be your chauffeur. - Don McCullin

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other. - Oscar Ameringer

Love as powerful as your mother's for you leaves its own mark ... to have been loved so deeply ... will give us some protection forever. - J K Rowling

In a world of complex threats, our security and leadership depends on all elements of our power - including strong and principled diplomacy. - Barack Obama

Social Security's not the hard one to solve. Medicare, that is the gorilla in the room, and you've got to put all of it on the table. - Joe Biden

I'm not an equipment nut. I tend to use whatever's at hand. I have several cameras, of course, but I'm not emotional about any of them. - Leonard Nimoy


World's Greatest Typo

Icehenge

Found It!

Puma Pants

Polar Bear Attack

Foot Sign Language

Winter Tires

Hooters Face Mask

Latte Art

Whiskey Toothpaste

Titanic's Non-Romantic Scene

Fake News

Steep Steps

Better Lawyer

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Snow Detour

No Time For This

Kwik-Mart Math

Croatian Landscaping

Best Fairy Tale

Back In Five Minutes

Winterized Motorcycle

If IKEA Ran GM

Six Hunnit