#1 humor site on the 'net

Read Your Book Case

Reading between the lines

Read Your Book Case thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
A big book is a big bore. - Callimachus

Book Jacket: A fable of contents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is no friend as loyal as a book. - Ernest Hemingway

I believe in God, only I spell it Nature. - Frank Lloyd Wright

I am the Roman Emperor and am above grammar. - Emperor Sigismund

Life without books, chocolate and coffee is just useless. - Nadun Lokuliyanage

Do not read beauty magazines. They only make you feel ugly. - Mary Schmich

You don't have good grammar when you type with your fists. - C.F. Payne

An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language. - Martin Buber

Dreams are illustrations from the book your soul is writing about you. - Marsha Norman

Laughter is, after speech, the chief thing that holds society together. - Max Eastman

Our waking hours form the text of our lives, our dreams, the commentary. - Unknown

One always tends to overpraise a long book, because one has got through it. - E M Forster

A mere scholar, who knows nothing but books, must be ignorant even of them. - William Hazlitt

I don't care what you say about me. Just be sure to spell my name wrong. - Barbra Streisand

There's far more truth in the Book of Genesis than in the quantum theory. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Book Censor: A person who reads so much he gets asterisks in front of his eyes - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The worst thing about new books is that they keep us from reading the old ones. - John Wooden

Books are as useful to a stupid person as a mirror is useful to a blind person. - Chanakya

The most technologically efficient machine that man has ever invented is the book. - Northrop Frye

I've read the last page of the Bible. It's all going to turn out all right. - Billy Graham

Officialese: A government language where you can understand the words, but not the sentences - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I want flowers, I don't want to text. What does that make me? What kind of dinosaur am I? - Jennifer Garner

There is no reason why the same man should like the same book at eighteen and at forty-eight. - Ezra Pound

I am a writer of books in retrospect. I talk in order to understand; I teach in order to learn. - Robert Frost

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train. - Oscar Wilde

I, schooled in misery, know many purifying rites, and I know where speech is proper and where silence. - Aeschylus

If there's a book you really want to read, but it hasn't been written yet, then you must write it. - Toni Morrison

My regular life today is reading books, making dolls houses, sewing dolls with my daughter and barbequing. - Milla Jovovich

It is what you read when you don't have to that determines what you will be when you can't help it. - Oscar Wilde

So I'm reading a book on my new iPad, but can't the iPad read it for me? Do I have to do everything? - Matthew Perry

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. - Groucho Marx

Life is like an overlong drama through which we sit being nagged by the vague memories of having read the reviews. - John Updike

It is books that teach us to refine our pleasures when young, and to recall them with satisfaction when we are old. - Leigh Hunt

He respects Owl, because you can't help respecting anybody who can spell TUESDAY, even if he doesn't spell it right. - A. A. Milne

I challenge you to make your life the masterpiece you want to paint, the novel you want to read, the day you want to wake to. - Toni Sorenson

Accountant: 1. A noble insect; 2. A dutiful book balancer whose role within a corporation is to protect it from creative ideas. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The symbolic language of the crucifixion is the death of the old paradigm; resurrection is a leap into a whole new way of thinking. - Deepak Chopra

Always try to use the language so as to make quite clear what you mean and make sure your sentence couldn't mean anything else. - C S Lewis

There is not less wit, not less invention, in applying rightly a thought one finds in a book, than in being the first author of that book. - Pierre Boyle


Wrench Dinosaur

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

One More Drop

Idling Eric Idle

Glass World - Where Plumbers Buy

High Heel Diver

Rising To The Occasion

Annual Meeting of the Ontario Summer Tires Club

I See You

Get Off Your High Horse

Redneck Towing

Revenge of the Stallion

Rat Cut

Spot the Hidden Barred Owl

Smoking Hot Body

Billy the Eagle Owl

Star Wars Fisherman

The Devil's Swimming Pool

Pet Dentist

Nuts And Fruitcakes

Spiral Staircase

Scubaru

Nordern Minnesota Yeneral Store

Pigeon Drink