#1 humor site on the 'net

Punctuation Is Importanter

English grammar lesson for British protesters

Punctuation Is Importanter thanks to Shawn Kennedy

Sign of opposite appeal: No, I want more!

QuotaBills
I believe in God, only I spell it Nature. - Frank Lloyd Wright

Speech is of time; silence is of eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

I am the Roman Emperor and am above grammar. - Emperor Sigismund

Tears at times have all the weight of speech. - Ovid

I will not down to posterity talking bad grammar. - Benjamin Disraeli

The English never draw a line without blurring it. - Winston Churchill

Free speech is a great idea, but we're in a war. - Lindsey Graham

A fool is known by his speech; and a wise man by silence. - Pythagoras

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - Lily Tomlin

We are all here for a spell; get all the good laughs you can. - Will Rogers

I respect a man who knows how to spell a word more than one way. - Mark Twain

When people are proud of their speech, be proud of your silence. - Luqman

"Let 'em eat cake," to quote the late Mark Antonette. - Archie Bunker

Changes in language often reflect the changing values of a culture. - Ravi Zacharias

Think like a wise man but communicate in the language of the people. - William Butler Yeats

I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way. - Mark Twain

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

Music is the literature of the heart; it commences where speech ends. - Alphonse de Lamartine

The English are not an inventive people; they don't eat enough pie. - Thomas Edison

I don't care what you say about me. Just be sure to spell my name wrong. - Barbra Streisand

Three problems we have: lack of boundaries, insufficient language, incompletions. - Thomas Leonard

The English should give Ireland home rule - and reserve the motion picture rights. - Will Rogers

A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the first word you thought of. - Burt Bacharach

Actions, looks, words and steps form the alphabet by which you may spell character. - Johann Kasper Lavater

I think of myself as being Jewish and Irish, despite the fact that I'm English. - Daniel Radcliffe

The funniest line in English is "Get it?" When you say that, everyone chortles. - Garrison Keillor

A person's name is, to that person, the sweetest, most important sound in any language. - Dale Carnegie

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech. - George Bernard Shaw

Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to. - Unknown

Human language appears to be a unique phenomenon, without significant analogue in the animal world. - Noam Chomsky

No bum that can't speak poifect English oughta stay in this country - oughta be de-exported the hell outta here! - Archie Bunker

The protean nature of the computer is such that it can act like a machine or like a language to be shaped and exploited. - Alan Kay

He respects Owl, because you can't help respecting anybody who can spell TUESDAY, even if he doesn't spell it right. - A. A. Milne

'Good English' is whatever educated people talk; so that what is good in one place or time would not be so in another. - C S Lewis

The wise man is but a clever infant, spelling letters from a hieroglyphical prophetic book, the lexicon of which lies in eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

It is Ireland's sacred duty to send over, every few years, a playwright to save the English theatre from inarticulate glumness. - Kenneth Tynan

If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart. - Nelson Mandela

Cricket - a game which the English, not being a spiritual people, have invented in order to give themselves some conception of eternity. - Lord Mancroft

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language?
One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap. - Red Skelton

Music is a language that doesn't speak in particular words. It speaks in emotions, and if it's in the bones, it's in the bones. - Keith Richards


7 Hours In 1 Image

Mexican School Bus

Tree Sorrow

OCD Electrician

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Redneck Shower Head

Wise Moves

Fox Hunting Madness

Emperor Penguins

The Side Effects of Veganism

Stair Railing Electrician

Cold Faucet

Make Womb For Baby

Hardtail Bike

Birth Control Kit

Come-Back Line Of The Year

Duck Gears

Chewing Gum Hazard

Keyboard Seating

Bent Over

Whatchamacallit Car

Gone To Market

Peak Bernie

Female IT Experts