Puff Inhalant

Laughter is the best medicine. - Joe-kster

Nature is cheaper than therapy. - M P Zarrella

A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb

The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

I went to a massage parlor. It was self service. - Rodney Dangerfield

The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. - French Proverb

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

Why is it we never get our bad medicine in small doses? - Edmund H North

No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

Save one life, you're a hero. Save 100 lives, you're a nurse. - Unknown

The last mosquito that bit me had to check into the Betty Ford clinic. - Joanna Lumley

You couldn't tell if she was dressed for an opera or an operation. - Irvin S Cobb

I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back. - Richard Lewis

The best way to reduce the cost of medical care is to reduce the illness. - Arlen Specter

Words must surely be counted among the most powerful drugs man ever invented. - Leo Rosten

To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

Poisons and medicine are oftentimes the same substance given with different intents. - Peter Mere Latham

I don't do drugs. If I want a rush I just stand up when I'm not expecting it. - Dylan Moran

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright

The practice of medicine occurs even in primitive society, but law accompanies civilization. - Saying

If you get a diagnosis, get on a therapy, keep a good attitude and keep your sense of humor. - Teri Garr

Most religious people accept medicine as a gift from God and reap the benefits of both realms. - Caroline Fraser

My opponent called me a cream puff. Well, I rushed out and got the baker's union to endorse me. - Claiborne Pell

Many people find themselves with illness as they become successful: higher blood pressure and diabetes. - Zong Qinghou

The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull

We cannot embrace God's forgiveness if we are so busy clinging to past wounds and nursing old grudges. - T D Jakes

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

Recommending gastric bypass as a national solution for our diabetes epidemic is bad medicine and bad economics. - Mark Hyman

Despite all our toil and progress, the art of medicine still falls somewhere between trout casting and spook writing. - Ben Hecht

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle

The public blabbers about preventive medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. - Martin H. Fischer

When you inhale, you are taking the strength from God. When you exhale, it represents the service you are giving to the world. - B.K. Iyengar

It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

There are three subjects on which the knowledge of the medical profession in general is woefully weak; they are manners, morals, and medicine. - Gerald F Lieberman

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller