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Nothing In The Fridge

A canine's survival guide to stocking up for hard times

Nothing In The Fridge thanks to Howard Chapman

Time for the dog to go on a diet

QuotaBills
Zombies hate fast food. - Unknown

Health food makes me sick. - Calvin Trillin

The dog is the god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher

Tacos are the food of genius. - Heather Brewer

Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff. - Unknown

The French: Germans with good food. - Fran Lebowitz

Food tastes better when you wear it. - Erin Dealey

To err is human, for forgive, canine. - Unknown

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

People will travel anywhere for good food. - Rene Redzepi

Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate. - Emily Dickinson

The more I see of men, the more I like dogs. - Madame de Stael

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life. - Oliver C. Wilson

She did not so much cook as assassinate food. - Storm Jameson

He who lies down with dogs, rises with fleas. - English Proverb

Food is an important part of a balanced diet. - Fran Lebowitz

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food. - Hippocrates

Food is our common ground, a universal experience. - James Beard

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

Food tastes best when you eat it with your own spoon. - Denmark Proverb

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy. - Amy Sedaris

Jello: The only food your husband has ever learned to cook - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Food, love, mother and career: the four basic guilt groups. - Cathy Guisewite

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbey

If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one. - Andrew A. Rooney

I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare

Chemically speaking, chocolate really is the world's perfect food. - Michael Levine

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick - not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

The trees in Siberia are miles apart - that's why the dogs are so fast. - Bob Hope

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. - Josh Billings

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

I've probably wasted a solid year of my life just staring into the fridge. - Bill Murray

Diplomacy is the art of saying, "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock. - Will Rogers

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

If more of us cared about food and home above gold, this world would be a merrier place. - Bilbo Baggins

So long as you have food in your mouth, you have solved all questions for the time being. - Franz Kafka

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose. - Garrison Keillor

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

By eating many fruits and vegetables in place of fast food and junk food, people could avoid obesity. - David H Murdock

If you turn the imagination loose like a hunting dog, it will often return with the bird in its mouth. - William Maxwell

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs. - Christopher Hampton

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

Food: The response Mom usually gives in answer to the question, "What's for dinner tonight?" - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Going without food or water will kill the body, but the lack of relationship will kill the minds and spirit. - David Jeremiah

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is certain dogs I know will go to heaven, and very, very few people. - James Thurber

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron

If you maintain a healthy diet, or at least are smart about your food choices, you'll still see the pounds come off. - Misty May-Treanor

I like simple food, seasoned with just salt, pepper, oil and vinegar. Complicated food and complicated lives are never good. - Sirio Maccioni

I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray

Every time you use the word 'healthy,' you lose. The key is to make yummy, delicious food that happens to be healthy. - Marcus Samuelsson

I like Pirate's Booty. Prunes and olives, too. I love hummus. I can eat that until I die. I tend to eat mostly organic food. - Queen Latifah

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

A designer knows that he has achieved perfection not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away. - Antoine de St-Expurey

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

Dogs laugh, but the laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end. - Max Eastman

Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash


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