Moonshiners

In wine, there is truth. - Pliny the Elder

Good wine needs no vine. - French Proverb

Good wine is a necessity of life. - Thomas Jefferson

Nurses are angels in comfortable shoes. - Unknown

When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller

We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown

Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney

He wants his son to follow in his footprints. - Archie Bunker

Wine is the flower in the buttonhole of life. - Werumeus Buning

Wine is the most civilized thing in the world. - Ernest Hemingway

If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. - George Carlin

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin

When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields

I did not have 3,000 pairs of shoes. I had 1,060. - Imelda Marcos

What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for. - Irish Proverb

I should never have switched from Scotch to martinis. - Humphrey Bogart

Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting? - WC Fields

Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

The littlest feet make the biggest footprints in our hearts. - Unknown

Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

Stop trying to make everybody happy - you're not tequila. - Unknown

God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

By the time they're ready to be thrown away, most shoes are thoroughly comfortable. - Andy Rooney

I always sleep with one shoe in my hand to put out any fires I may accidentally ignite. - Gene Fowler

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

Why is it that everybody's suing the tobacco companies and not the alcohol companies? - Donald Trump

They went into my closets looking for skeletons, but thank God, all they found were shoes. - Imelda Marcos

My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown

Measure thy life by loss instead of gain, not by the wine drunk, but the wine poured forth. - Harriet King

The ballet toe shoe is one of the few instruments of torture to survive intact into our time. - Unknown

I walk around like everything if fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off. - Unknown

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

I don't have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They're upstairs in my socks. - Groucho Marx

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. - WC Fields

If you have to choose between drinking wine every day or being skinny, which would you choose: Red or White? - Unknown

There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron

In those days the best painkiller was ice. It wasn't addictive, and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. - George Burns

Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown

Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown

Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor