Massage Therapist

No doctor is better than three. - German Proverb

One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb

I'm so mean, I make medicine sick. - Muhammad Ali

The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker

I went to a massage parlor. It was self service. - Rodney Dangerfield

Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine. - Lord Byron

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker

Life itself still remains a very effective therapist. - Karen Horney

Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher

The doctor is often more to be feared than the disease. - French Proverb

Whether a person is a male or female, a nurse is a nurse. - Gary Veale

A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer

I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett

Joy is more divine than sorrow, for joy is bread and sorrow is medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard

A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker

Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham

The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire

I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for. - James H. Boren

The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer

Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle

The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient, whilst Mother Nature takes care of the cure. - Voltaire

Medicine, the only profession that labours incessantly to destroy the reason for its own existence. - James Bryce

Many people find themselves with illness as they become successful: higher blood pressure and diabetes. - Zong Qinghou

Some of these people need ten years of therapy - ten sentences of mine do not equal ten years of therapy. - Oscar Wilde

The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull

Kindness and a generous spirit go a long way. And a sense of humor. It's like medicine - very healing. - Max Irons

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - O.S. Marden

The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick

The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers

The public blabbers about preventive medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. - Martin H. Fischer

The Pentagon still has not given a name to the Iraqi war. Somehow 'Operation Re-elect Bush' doesn't seem to be popular. - Jay Leno

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

I see God in every human being. When I wash the leper's wounds, I feel I am nursing the Lord himself. Is it not a beautiful experience? - Mother Theresa

One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler