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Iron Ladies

Today's modern woman doesn't belong in a kitchen!

Iron Ladies thanks to Cheryl Bonita

QuotaBills
I am an optimistic lady. - Julie Andrews

What Britain needs is an iron lady. - Margaret Thatcher

Tarnished Lady: One that is not bright - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

As iron sharpens iron, one man sharpens another. - Bible

Rustic: Blood sucking insect which oxidizes iron - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A gentleman never strikes a lady with his hat on. - Fred Allen

To my embarrassment, I was born in bed with a lady. - Wilson Mizner

It doesn't help your five-iron if you're pretty. - Laura Baugh

This is a feminist bookstore. There is no humour section. - John Callahan

Elevator: A metal container used to move sardines up and down. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Sometimes I consider myself as a feminist, whatever that means. - Sarah Palin

Ladies' Sewing Circle: Where more husbands are darned than socks - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Don't say the old lady screamed. Bring her on and let her scream. - Mark Twain

Ever notice how irons have a setting for "permanent" press? - Steven Wright

There is not so variable a thing in nature as a lady's head-dress. - Joseph Addison

Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking. - William B. Sprague

My mom told me a long time ago, 'Never get in a fight with a lady.' - Oliver North

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

You don't know real embarrassment until your hip sets off a metal detector. - Ross McGuinness

The one thing I do not want to be called is First Lady. It sounds like a saddle horse. - Jacqueline Kennedy

The Iron Curtain may be a thing of the past, but Mother Russia is as mysterious as ever. - Robert Gottlieb

The cure for a broken heart is simple, my lady. A hot bath and a good night's sleep. - Margaret George

The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron. - Phyllis Diller

I'm kind of honored to be a dragon lady. The dragon is a very powerful, mythical animal. - Yoko Ono

Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket. - Ambrose Bierce

Let's just say, I'm Irish. I grew up in the 1950s. Religion had a very tight iron fist. - Liam Neeson

Poker Hand: What you do when you’re trying to get a blood sample from the finger of a lady - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Good Secretary: A stenographer who must think like a man, act like a lady, and work like a horse - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid. - Jane Austen

Ladies, if a man says he will fix it, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it. - Unknown

Truth is always present; it only needs to lift the iron lids of the mind's eye to read its oracles. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I asked the waiter, "Is this milk fresh?" He said, "Lady, three hours ago it was grass." - Phyllis Diller

The Honourable Lady was once an egg and people on both sides of this House greatly regret its fertilisation. - Nicholas Fairbairn

Women are the most powerful magnet in the universe. And all men are cheap metal. And we all know where north is. - Larry Miller

A teacher who is attempting to teach without inspiring the pupil with a desire to learn is hammering on cold iron. - Horace Mann

When I was in boy scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle. A little old lady had to help me across the street. - Steven Wright

I'm not just retiring from the company, I'm also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron. - Hartman Jule

A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady, and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat. - P.J. O'Rourke

I like cast iron coated with enamel for longevity and forgiveness if I happen to take my eyes off the prize while pouring Chianti. - Mario Batali

Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind. - Leonardo da Vinci


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