Ice Hockey Meltdown

Hockey is the original extreme sport. - Tom Ward

I always wake up at the crack of ice. - Joe E Lewis

Outdoor hockey is what it is all about. - Paul Coffey

Hockey is figure skating in a war zone. - Unknown

To succeed in hockey, you need teamwork. - Henry Samueli

People on the streets are ready for hockey. - Eric Lindros

Room service - don't send up any more ice. - WC Fields

Some guys play hockey. Gretzky plays 40-mph chess. - Lowell Cohn

Some say the world will end in fire, some say in ice. - Robert Frost

Figure skaters have awful perceptions of hockey players. - Kristi Yamaguchi

I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass. - David Lee Roth

The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass. - Martin Mull

Ninety percent of hockey is mental and the other half is physical. - Wayne Gretzky

Life is too short to eat vanilla ice cream and dance with boring men. - Unknown

The greatest hockey player who ever lived: Bobby Orr, and I love him. - Donald S. Cherry

My wife likes the hockey smell because it's the smell of a warrior. - David Walton

Break the ice in a crowded elevator by asking how much everyone weighs. - Bill Murray

I love hockey because of the respect for history and for the game itself. - George Vecsey

People know me from a hockey game, from an earthquake, from the O.J case. - Al Michaels

Where beams of imagination play,
The memory's soft figures melt away. - Alexander Pope

You can't play hockey with a bald spot, so I'm hanging up the skates. - Joe Sakic

When it gets hot like this, you know what I do? I keep my undies in the ice box. - Marilyn Monroe

I never looked at hockey as work. Now that I'd finished playing, I had to go to work. - Bobby Orr

I like ice hockey. No one is ever going to ask me to write about that as a metaphor for life. - Steven Pinker

A statistician can have his head in the oven and his feet in ice, and on average he feels fine. - Unknown

Hockey players wear numbers because you can't always identify the body with dental records. - Unknown

Everything slows down with age. Except the time it takes cake and ice cream to reach your hips. - John Wagner

We all get the same amount of ice. The rich get it in the summer. The poor get it in the winter. - Bat Masterson

Age does not diminish the extreme disappointment of having a scoop of ice cream fall from the cone. - Jim Fiebig

Field hockey is my strongest sport, and if I lose a game, I take a long, hot bath and moan about it. - Emma Watson

I played basketball in high school, and I love watching sports - I'll watch everything except maybe hockey. - Andy Roddick

I love those hockey moms. You know what they say the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull is? Lipstick. - Sarah Palin

When I was in boy scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle. A little old lady had to help me across the street. - Steven Wright

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

When you're stressed, eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts. - Unknown

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. - Tiger Woods

Puck: 1. A hard rubber disc that hockey players strike when they can't hit one another; 2. Last week's left-over biscuit. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When it comes to hockey, it's been in my blood since I was 3 or 4 years old. I love coaching the kids, especially at that level. - Mario Lemieux

Baseball happens to be a game of cumulative tension but football, basketball and hockey are played with hand grenades and machine guns. - John Leonard

In those days the best painkiller was ice. It wasn't addictive, and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. - George Burns