#1 humor site on the 'net

HeidleBurger

They don't make the wurst - they make the best!

HeidleBurger thanks to joe-kster

Best burgers in Leavenworth, Washington

QuotaBills
Let them eat cake. - Marie Antoinette

Food tastes better when you wear it. - Erin Dealey

Laughter is brightest where food is best. - Irish Proverb

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life. - Oliver C. Wilson

I wouldn't eat a hamburger for 40,000 dollars. - River Phoenix

Where love sets the table, food tastes at its best. - French Proverb

My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it. - Boris Johnson

I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27. - Clement Attlee

I don't even butter my bread. I consider that cooking. - Katherine Cebrian

You are only master of food that you haven't yet eaten. - Tibet Proverb

A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. - James Beard

So I will say it with relish. Give me a hamburger but hold the lawsuit. - S.I. Hayakawa

The maxim that the "best is the cheapest" does not apply to food. - W.O. Atwater

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick - not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen

Your food is close to your stomach, but you must put it in your mouth first. - African Saying

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice. - Ethel Merman

Exercise is king, nutrition is queen. Put them together and you have a kingdom. - Jack LaLanne

I don't follow trends. I make each cake for a particular wedding, or event. - Ron Ben-Israel

On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners. - George Mikes

An Englishman teaching an American about food is like the blind leading the one-eyed. - A.J. Liebling

I always thought that bagels and lox was my soul food, but it turns out it's sushi. - Sara Sheridan

We have always said that advertising is just the icing on the cake. It is not the cake. - Meg Whitman

If more of us cared about food and home above gold, this world would be a merrier place. - Bilbo Baggins

I like spaghetti bolognese, I like baked beans on toast. I hate French food. I hate fancy food. - Simon Cowell

Number theorists are like lotus-eaters – having once tasted of this food they can never give it up. - Leopold Kronecker

Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside. - Mark Twain

A compromise is the art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he has the biggest piece. - Ludwig Erhard

I refuse to believe that trading recipes is silly. Tuna-fish casserole is at least as real as corporate stock. - Barbara Harrison

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron

There are a zillion variables to a hamburger. What part of the animal went into it. What coarseness. What temperature. - Danny Meyer

A burrito is a delicious food item that breaks down all social barriers and leads to temporary spiritual enlightenment. - Lisi Harrison

How come if you mix flour and water together you get glue? And when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go? - Rita Rudner

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen." - Unknown

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo

If it's flipping hamburgers at McDonald's, be the best hamburger flipper in the world. Whatever it is you do you have to master your craft. - Snoop Dogg

There is one longing almost as deep and imperious as the desire for food and sleep. It is the desire to be great. It is the desire to be important. - Dale Carnegie


Multi-Pour Coffee Pot

Things Bottled Up

Cake Message

SnowCut

Depressing Situation

Starbucks Goes Extra Mile

Turbo Snail

Power Outage

Beijing Redneck

Late Lecture

Escapism

Wine Secret

It's All Mine

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Big Card Game

Sweet Chopper

Spaghetti Tree

Inglish Spikkers Welcom

Where Astronauts Hang Out

Wrap Around Tree

Take The Bus Home

Bent Car Sculpture

International Truck Bed

Strong Man