Girlfriend Math

God gave me my money. - John D Rockefeller

Money: the poor man's credit card. - Marshal McLuhan

The love of evil is the root of all money. - American Proverb

Money follows passion - not the other way around. - Unknown

Waitress: A woman who thinks money grows on trays - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Money no longer talks. It just goes without saying. - George Humphrey

I can't afford to die - I'd lose too much money. - George Burns

Those have a short Lent who owe money to be paid at Easter. - Benjamin Franklin

Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back. - Steven Wright

Politics is for the present, but an equation is for eternity. - Albert Einstein

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra. - Fran Lebowitz

If a man's wit be wandering, let him study the mathematics. - Francis Bacon

An education obtained with money is worse than no education at all. - Socrates

A billion here, a billion there - pretty soon it adds up to real money. - Everett Dirksen

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something. - Jackie Mason

High school is a lot like toilet paper: you only miss it when it's gone. - Unknown

Mathematics consists of proving the most obvious thing in the least obvious way. - George Polya

When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth... think of algebra. - Will Rogers

The principal benefit acting has afforded me is the money to pay for my psychoanalysis. - Marlon Brando

I like to crack the jokes now and again, but it's only because I struggle with math. - Tina Fey

College Professor: A man who gets what's left over after the football coach is paid off - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Life on a farm is a school of patience. You can't hurry the crops or make an ox in two days. - Haneri Liogier

I'm proud to be paying taxes. The only thing is, I could be just as proud for half the money. - Arthur Godfrey

The man who leaves money to charity in his will is only giving away what no longer belongs to him. - Voltaire

True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your high school class is running the country. - Kurt Vonnegut

Bathtubs are the epitome of luxury. Either you have no money to own one or you have no time to use one. - Akilnathan Logeswaran

Graduate School: The place where a young scholar goes off his Dad's payroll - and on to his wife's - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Most men would rather have their bellies opened for five hundred dollars than have a tooth pulled for five. - Martin H. Fischer

Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years. - George Burns

America is the country where you can buy a lifetime supply of aspirin for a dollar and use it up in two weeks. - Barrymore

Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's watching. - Satchel Paige

Mathematics is the only science where one never knows what one is talking about nor whether what is said is true. - Bertrand Russell

I went to the bank and reviewed my savings. I found out I have all the money I'll ever need if I die tomorrow. - Henny Youngman

Always remember money isn't everything - but also remember to make a lot of it before talking such fool nonsense. - Earl Wilson

Keeping books on social aid is capitalistic nonsense. I just use the money for the poor. I can't stop to count it. - Evita Peron

Money isn't the most important thing in life, but it's reasonably close to oxygen on the "gotta have it" scale. - Zig Ziglar

You can't be afraid of getting old. Old is good, if you're gathering in life. Our band is good at understanding that equation. - Bruce Springsteen

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

Commerce: A kind of transaction in which A plunders from B the goods of C, and for compensation B picks the pocket of D of money belonging to E. - Ambrose Bierce