#1 humor site on the 'net

Found The Apple Maps Car

At least Google driverless cars stay on the road

Found The Apple Maps Car thanks to Keith Blake

Meet the New Apple Maps Street View Car

QuotaBills
Afford: Popular type of car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Life is too short for traffic. - Dan Bellack

Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There are no traffic jams on the extra mile. - Zig Ziglar

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

Traffic Ticket: Finale of the policeman's bawl - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines. - David Letterman

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

We all thought we'd have flying cars by now, but we don't. - Dana Brunetti

If some countries have too much history, we have too much geography. - William Lyon Mackenzie King

Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic. - Dan Rather

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

We're all pilgrims on the same journey, but some pilgrims have better road maps. - Nelson DeMille

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

Wars of nations are fought to change maps. But wars of poverty are fought to map change. - Muhammad Ali

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

I have to tell them that last night was a shameful train wreck filled with blind cuddly puppies. - Charlie Sheen

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk

Standing in the middle of the road is very dangerous; you get knocked down by traffic from both sides. - Margaret Thatcher

If I weren't skateboarding, I'd love to race cars. I like anything that's fast and active. - Ryan Sheckler

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest. - Kin Hubbard

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

Poverty: 1. A state of mind sometimes induced by a neighbour's new car; 2. One thing that money can't buy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Do you think you're safe in a car with your seatbelt on? Dream on. My friend thought so. Now she's pregnant. - Anke Engelke

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 2,000 MPG. - Bill Gates

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

My whole body is a wreck. I've injured myself so many times with jujitsu, skateboarding, football. I guess I like to live hard. - Scott Caan

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt


Cross Inspector

Morning Saving Time

Kangaroo On Ice

Life's Choices

Olympic Torch Bearers

Lethal Weapon

Cell Shaver

Getting Goosed

No Swimming

Drift Racing

Alligators vs. Crocodiles

Cure for Internet Addiction

Seal LOL

Keyboard Seating

Illusive Dice

Cockroach Cancer

Time Management

People Crossing

Cozy Home

Redneck Faucet

Duck That Did Not Duck

Chewie, We're Home

Introducing the iPhone 20

Meateor