#1 humor site on the 'net

Fish Diet Meal

Making your budget stretch farther at the supermarket

Fish Diet Meal thanks to Keith Blake

Bubba looked forward to his first salmon feast

QuotaBills
Sushi Vendor: A sell-fish guy - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Fish and visitors stink after three days. - Benjamin Franklin

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a net. - Cynthia Heimel

You know why fish are so thin? They eat fish. - Jerry Seinfeld

Food is an important part of a balanced diet. - Fran Lebowitz

The heart, like the stomach, wants a varied diet. - Gustave Flaubert

Love is the net where hearts are caught like fish. - Muhammad Ali

I have laid aside business, and gone a'fishing. - Izaak Walton

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat. - Erma Bombeck

At high tide, fish eat ants; at low tide, ants eat fish. - Thai Saying

Don't bargain for fish which are still in the water. - India Proverb

I don't trust any diet that doesn't allow sugar. - Bethenny Frankel

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain. - Mark Twain

Your diet is a bank account. Good food choices are good investments. - Bethenny Frankel

A lawyer is an odd sort of fish, first rotten, then green, then ripe. - Robert Christy

Good fishing is just a matter of timing. You have to get there yesterday. - Milton Berle

No disease that can be treated by diet should be treated by any other means. - Maimonides

What you need is somebody new - there's more than 1 fish in the woodpile. - Archie Bunker

I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge? - Douglas Adams

I am on a ketos diet so I avoid sugar, dairy products, wheat, grain or pulses. - Puneet Issar

Don't be a fish; be a frog. Swim in the water and jump when you hit ground. - Kim Young-ha

I went fishing with Rod Ewert. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. - Steven Wright

They laughed at Robert Fulton but without him, New York wouldn't have a fish market. - Archie Bunker

Governing a large country is like frying a small fish. You spoil it with too much poking. - Lao-Tzu

Fishing is not like billiards, in which it is possible to attain a disgusting perfection. - Arthur Ransome

Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after. - Henry David Thoreau

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. - Joe E Lewis

The opposite for courage is not cowardice, it is conformity. Even a dead fish can go with the flow. - Jim Hightower

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

If you maintain a healthy diet, or at least are smart about your food choices, you'll still see the pounds come off. - Misty May-Treanor

There is only one thing harder than looking for a dewdrop in the dew, and that is fishing for a clam in the clam chowder. - New England Proverb

Somebody just back of you while you are fishing is as bad as someone looking over your shoulder while you write a letter to your girl. - Ernest Hemingway

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. - Dave Attell

My daily diet consists of basically anything I think looks tasty, whether that's pizza, sushi, burgers, quesadillas. I like everything. - Cameron Dallas

Memory is a net: one finds it full of fish when he takes it from the brook, but a dozen miles of water have run through it without sticking. - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.


Pocket Change

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Welcome to Texas, USPS

Not Without A Washer

Jogger's Weight Scale

Toilet Snake

Eye Testing In Progress

Parent Signature

Long Bore Gun

Bird Cam

Lost Wormhole

Where Weir'd Frogmen Jump In

Low Ceiling Workout

Dog Diner

Wet T-Shirt Contest Winners

Cow Farts

Revenge

Gaping Hole Costume

Redneck Water Skiing

Harrison Ford

Plenty of Room for God's Creatures

Aussie Selfie

Pyramid Kiss

Piano Door Bell