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Elf Safety

Santa's helpers now wear hard hats

Elf Safety thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Safety gone mad

QuotaBills
Santa's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker

My alone time is for everyone's safety. - Unknown

Rich gifts wax poor when givers prove unkind. - William Shakespeare

Housewarming: The last call for wedding presents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Safety is a cheap and effective insurance policy. - Unknown

In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd

Each day comes bearing its own gifts. Untie the ribbons. - Ruth Ann Schabacker

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. - Victor Borge

Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue. - Virginia Woolf

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

Lisa, vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and Eskimos. - Homer Simpson

The traveler with empty pockets pursues his journey in perfect safety. - Ovid

Opportunity does not knock. It presents itself when you beat down the door. - Kyle Chandler

Those gifts are ever the most acceptable which the giver has made precious. - Ovid

Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

Having hope will give you courage. You will be protected and will rest in safety. - Bible

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

It's one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself, to forgive. Forgive everybody. - Maya Angelou

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

In any given moment we have two options: to step forward into growth or step back into safety. - Abraham Maslow

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

When asked what gift he wanted for his birthday, the yogi replied: I wish no gifts, only presence. - Unknown

No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas. - Robert Kirby

Individuality is either the mark of genius or the reverse. Mediocrity finds safety in standardization. - Frederick Crane

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey

We are each given a limitless capacity to love and attain wisdom. The extent we use these gifts is our choice. - Anthony Douglas

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

Technology is a queer thing. It brings you great gifts with one hand, and it stabs you in the back with the other. - Carrie Snow

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

We are all born with a grab bag on gifts and gaps. Identify your true talents, then find out how to use them to make money. - Bill O'Reilly

Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple

Faithfulness is essential to the character of a friend: without this there can be no safety in intimacy with and confidence in him. - Samuel Hopkins

Unrest of spirit is a mark of life; one problem after another presents itself and in the solving of them we can find our greatest pleasure. - Kal Menninger


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