Don't Count On It

Illusion is the first of all pleasures. - Oscar Wilde

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so. - Douglas Adams

Inflation: everyone's illusion of wealth - Unknown

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. - Ludwig Borne

And now to hole eight, which is in fact the eighth hole. - Peter Alliss

What a strange illusion to suppose that beauty is goodness. - Leo Tolstoy

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. - Albert Einstein

Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion. - Miguel de Unamuno

If we choose, we can live in a world of comforting illusion. - Noam Chomsky

There are 350 varieties of shark, not counting loan and pool. - L.M. Boyd

Illusion is the dust the devil throws in the eyes of the foolish. - Minna Antrim

My favourite quotation is eight pounds ten for a second-hand suit. - Spike Milligan

Some of my best friends are illusions. Been sustaining me for years. - Sheila Ballantyne

We're about eight Einsteins away from understanding the universe. - Martin Amis

Our separation from each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. - Albert Einstein

I need my sleep. I need about eight hours a day, and about ten at night. - Bill Hicks

Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly. - Morticia Addams

There are eighty-eight keys on a piano and within that, an entire universe. - James Rhodes

Jealousy is the art of counting someone else's blessings instead of your own. - Unknown

Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are unimportant. - George Burns

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. - George Bernard Shaw

Like the cosmetics industry, the securities business is engaged in selling illusion. - Paul Samuelson

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin

I may not have been the greatest president, but I've had the most fun eight years. - Bill Clinton

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure. - Scott Adams

Wishes and fears are illusions, Dil Bahadur, not realities. You must practice detachment. - Isabel Allende

And will you succeed? Yes indeed, yes indeed! Ninety-eight and three-quarters percent guaranteed! - Dr. Seuss

The illusion that the times that were are better than those that are has probably pervaded all ages. - Horace Greeley

By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day. - Robert Frost

Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist but you have ceased to live. - Mark Twain

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. - Woody Allen

Sometimes people don't want to hear the truth because they don't want their illusions destroyed. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Dreams or illusions, call them what you will, they lift us from the commonplace of life to better things. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by someone who is detached. - Simone Weil

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to squeeze in eight hours of TV a day. - Homer Simpson

We would rather be ruined than changed. We would rather die in our dread than climb the cross of the moment and let our illusions die. - W H Auden

Love easily confuses us because it is always in flux between illusion and substance, between memory and wish, between contentment and need. - Tom Robbins

My mother was a reader, and she read to us. She read us Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde when I was six and my brother was eight. I never forgot it. - Stephen King

If I'm ever stuck on a respirator or a life support system, I definitely want to be unplugged, but not until I'm down to a size eight. - Henriette Mantel

Fiber: Edible wood-pulp said to aid digestion and prolong life, so that we might enjoy another six or eight years in which to consume wood-pulp - Daffynitions joe-ks.com