#1 humor site on the 'net

Customers Wanted

How to attract consumers with do-it-yourself marketing

Customers Wanted thanks to Lou Rawls

Help Wanted signs where no experience necessary

QuotaBills
Food is our common ground, a universal experience. - James Beard

Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes. - Oscar Wilde

Marketing isn't magic. There is a science to it. - Dan Zarrella

People will buy anything that's one to a customer. - Sinclair Lewis

A proverb is a short sentence based on long experience. - Miguel De Cervantes

I'm not 40 - I'm 18 with 22 years' experience. - Unknown

If you really want to experience God, go and make disciples. - Francis Chan

Advertising is the greatest art form of the twentieth century. - Marshall McLuhan

Marketing and innovation are the two chief functions of business. - Peter F Drucker

Trekking means a travelling experience with a thrilling excitement. - Amit Kalantri

In good times, people want to advertise; in bad times, they have to. - Bruce Barton

Judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment. - Simon Bolivar

A man has no ears for that to which experience has given him no access. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it. - Steven Wright

Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising. - Mark Twain

However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results. - Winston Churchill

Strategy 101 is all about choices: you can't be all things to all people. - Michael Porter

Smartphones are reinventing the connection between companies and their customers. - Rich Miner

Advertising Agency: Eighty-five percent confusion and fifteen percent commission. - Fred Allen

Experience is not what happens to a man. It is what a man does with what happens to him. - Aldous Huxley

Life is short, art long, opportunity fleeting, experience treacherous, judgment difficult. - Hypocrites

Good marketing makes the company look smart. Great marketing makes the customer feel smart. - Joe Chernov

Every crucial experience can be regarded as a setback - or the start of a new kind of development. - Mary R Rinehart

It's our experience that political leaders don't always mean the opposite of what they say. - Abba Eban

Advertising is the modern substitute for argument; its function is to make the worse appear the better. - George Santayana

When you are skinning your customers, you should leave some skin on to grow so that you can skin them again. - Nikita S Khrushchev

The aim of marketing is to know and understand the customer so well the product or service fits him and sells itself. - Peter F Drucker

Year's end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us. - Hal Borland

Music is your own experience, your thoughts, your wisdom. If you don't live it, it won't come out of your horn. - Charlie Parker

The basis of our partnership strategy and our partnership approach: We build the social technology. They provide the music. - Mark Zuckerberg

I used to advertise my loyalty and I don't believe there is a single person I loved that I didn't eventually betray. - Albert Camus

Understand the key factors in the math behind viral marketing, and use those to figure out what it takes to get viral growth. - David Skok

With traditional marketing, you tell people you are a rock star. With content marketing, you show them you're a rock star. - Robert Rose

Instead of one-way interruption, Web marketing is about delivering useful content at just the precise moment that a buyer needs it. - David M. Scott

In order to engage on social, in order to attract customers, regardless of what kind of customer you have, you have to build trust. - Lindsay Scarpello

The blood of Christ covers all of our sins, but each of us must do personal business with God in order to experience his forgiveness. - Lewis B Smedes

It is important to expect nothing, to take every experience, including the negative ones, as merely steps on the path, and to proceed. - Ram Dass

It is always self-defeating to pretend to the style of a generation younger than your own; it simply erases your own experience in history. - Renata Adler

Search, a marketing method that didn't exist a decade ago, provides the most efficient and inexpensive way for businesses to find leads. - John Battelle

Good content should be at the heart of your strategy, but it is equally important to keep the display context of that content in mind as well. - Tim Frick


Train Boat

Yarn Bombing a Bus

Canned Art

Bubble Boy

High Wire Bear Feeder

Manitoba Thunderstorm

Watermelon Shark

Curses, Foiled Again

Recipe Holder

Where Do You Want To Eat?

Pick Up After Your Dogs!

Lego Bridge

Falls Trail Tree

Melting Kayak

Beetle Collection

Croc Diet

Plane Restaurant

Holiday Fun

Sandwich Shoes

Fearless

Finally Got A Haircut

Fedorable Platypuses

Lego Sushi

Hedge Face