#1 humor site on the 'net

Cool Reading Room

Finding a quiet place to read

Cool Reading Room thanks to Wayne Nowazek

My time in the spotlight

QuotaBills
So many books, so little time. - Frank Zappa

Never judge a book by its movie. - J.W. Egan

Beware the man of a single book. - Bertrand Russell

Book Jacket: A fable of contents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Keep cool; anger is not an argument. - Daniel Webster

You live several lives while reading. - William Styron

Never read a book that is not a year old. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Every man is a volume, if you how to read him. - W. E. Channing

Every man is a volume if you know how to read him. - William Ellery Channing

Anybody who doesn't like this book is healthy. - Groucho Marx

Reading is a basic tool in the living of a good life. - Joseph Addison

That Book, sir, is the Rock on which our Republic rests. - Andrew Jackson

The more sins you confess, the more books you will sell. - American Proverb

You can learn a line from a win and a book from a defeat. - Paul Brown

Life without books, chocolate and coffee is just useless. - Nadun Lokuliyanage

Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk? - Steven Wright

I have the body of an 18-year-old. I keep it in the fridge. - Spike Milligan

If pregnancy were a book, they would cut the last two chapters. - Nora Ephron

The best books... are those that tell you what you know already. - George Orwell

It is best to read the weather forecasts before we pray for rain. - Mark Twain

A musicologist is a man who can read music but can't hear it. - Thomas Beecham

The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page. - St. Augustine

Some day you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again. - C S Lewis

If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge? - Unknown

We shouldn't teach great books; we should teach a love of reading. - B.F. Skinner

Don't judge a book by its cover 'til you've read the book. - Jamie Lee Curtis

I read the newspapers avidly. It is my one form of continuous fiction. - Aneurin Bevan

Dreams are illustrations from the book your soul is writing about you. - Marsha Norman

Life is a storybook, and those who do not travel only read but a page. - Ravi Zacharias

My problem with reading books is that I get distracted. By other books. - Unknown

I have never known any distress that an hour's reading did not relieve. - Charles de Montesquieu

This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read. - Winston Churchill

Someone told me that each equation I included in the book would halve the sales. - Stephen Hawking

For those of you who haven't read the book, it's been published tomorrow. - David Frost

It often happens that the quotations constitute the most valuable part of a book. - Vicesimus Knox

Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I'll waste no time reading it. - Moses Hadas

Books of poetry by young writers are usually promissory notes that are never met. - Oscar Wilde

The summer movies are coming out! My advice: just stay home and burn a good book. - Stephen Colbert

Technology is cool, but you've got to use it as opposed to letting it use you. - Prince

The books that the world calls immoral are books that show the world its own shame. - Oscar Wilde

I might love my e-reader, but I'd never pass up the chance to browse real books. - Nichole Chase

Like the Good Book says, "Let him who is without sin be the rolling stone." - Archie Bunker

The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. - Mark Twain

Having your book turned into a movie is like seeing your oxen turned into bouillon cubes. - John Le Carre

I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne

All the days ordained for me
Were written in your book
Before one of them came to be. - Psalms 139:16

I wondher why ye can always read a doctor's bill an' ye niver can read his purscription. - Finley Peter Dunne

A capacity and taste for reading gives access to whatever has already been discovered by others. - Abraham Lincoln

It is an unfortunate human failing that a full pocket book groans more loudly than an empty stomach. - Franklin D Roosevelt

We read that we ought to forgive our enemies; but we do not read that we ought to forgive our friends. - Cosimo de Medici

I took a speed reading course and read "War and Peace" in twenty minutes. It involves Russia. - Woody Allen

Reading a good book in silence is like eating chocolate for the rest of your life and never getting fat. - Becca Fitzpatrick

If there's a book you really want to read, but it hasn't been written yet, then you must write it. - Toni Morrison

When you finally accept that you're a complete dork, your life gets easier. No sense in trying to be cool. - Reese Witherspoon

Keeping books on social aid is capitalistic nonsense. I just use the money for the poor. I can't stop to count it. - Evita Peron

The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned now to cook. - Andy Rooney

When you read a classic you do not see in the book more than you did before. You see more in you than there was before. - Clifton Fadiman

I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face. - Rodney Dangerfield

It is astonishing with how little reading a doctor can practice medicine, but is not astonishing how badly he may do it. - William Osler

Laughter is healing and helpful and fun, and I see my role as an entertainer, and I want readers to leave my books smiling. - Gail Carriger

The best way to become a successful writer is to read good writing, remember it, and then forget where you remember it from. - Gene Fowler

When it comes to housework the one thing no book of household management can ever tell you is how to begin. Or maybe I mean why. - Katharine Whitehorn

Unless a man has considerable skill and reliance in his weapon, he will not remain cool in the presence of dangerous game close by. - Townsend Whelen

The highest and most beautiful things in life are not to be heard about, nor read about, nor seen but, if one will, are to be lived. - Soren Kierkegaard

If you want your children to be intelligent, read them fairy tales. If you want them to be more intelligent, read them more fairy tales. - Albert Einstein

No book is really worth reading at the age of ten which is not equally - and often far more - worth reading at the age of fifty and beyond. - C S Lewis

If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each man's life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm any hostility. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Meditation here may think down hours to moments. Here the heart may give a useful lesson to the head and learning wiser grow without his books. - William Cowper

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson

More people watch television and get their information that way than read books. I find new technology and new ways of communication very exciting. - Stephen Covey


Global Warming Protest

Canadian Fast Food

Wienermobile Crash

Caribou Walking

Human Pixels

Ruling On Criticism

The New Canada

Pail Face

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Redneck DoorBells

Psychic Fair

Panda Push

Lunch Apple

Protective Wings

Socket To Me

Work Not

I Shoot People!

Warm Them Up

Nautical Sense of Humour

Vegan Brownies

Worst Action Photographer

New Ghost Rider

Paint Ladder

Sidewalk Malt Melt