QuotaBillsI eat swiss cheese from the inside out. - Steven Wright
Cantaloupe: Got to get married in Church - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
American cheese is the perfect soft taco. - Wylie Dufresne
Bonjour, you cheese-eating surrender monkeys. - Groundskeeper Willie
I'm as single as a slice of American cheese. - Nick Cannon
Make love, not war... or get married and do both. - Unknown
What happens to the hole when the cheese is gone? - Bertoit Brecht
Sticking with a marriage. That's true grit, man. - Jeff Bridges
There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb
Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage." - Herbert Spencer
I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years. - Sam Kinison
How can you govern a country which has 246 varieties of cheese? - Charles de Gaulle
The more you invest in a marriage, the more valuable it becomes. - Amy Grant
Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp
I eat swiss cheese. But I only nibble on it. I make the holes bigger. - Steven Wright
A man in love is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished. - Zsa Zsa Gabor
A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes. - Joseph Addison
Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad. - Woody Allen
It's diamonds in your pockets one week, macaroni and cheese the next. - Jolene Blalock
Marriage halves our griefs, doubles our joys, and quadruples our expenses. - G K Chesterton
I've been married so long I'm on my third bottle of Tabasco sauce. - Susan Vass
If men knew how women pass the time when they are alone, they'd never marry. - O. Henry
Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle
If I get married again, I want a guy there with a drum to do rim shots during the vows. - Sam Kinison
Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action. - Unknown
Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel. - Leonardo da Vinci
I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married. - Lewis Grizzard
Without the will, marriage is a mockery; without the emotion, it is a drudgery. You need both. - Ravi Zacharias
The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one. - Unknown
It is not your love that sustains the marriage, but from now on, the marriage that sustains your love. - Dietrich Bonhoeffer
I love being married. I was single for a long time, and I just got so sick of finishing my own sentences. - Brian Kiley
My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher. - Socrates
The best reason for a knitter to marry is that you can't teach the cat to be impressed when you finish a lace scarf. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee
I think hearts are very much like glasses - if they do not break with the first ring, they usually last a considerable time. - Letitia Landon
Camping is not a date; it's an endurance test. If you can survive camping with someone, you should marry them on the way home. - Yvonne Prinz
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw
A politician should have three hats. One for throwing into the ring, one for talking through, and one for pulling rabbits out of if elected. - Carl Sandburg
Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who make you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat. - Joanne Woodward
One advantage of marriage is that when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again. - Judith Viorst