Church Karma

Hell is a half-filled auditorium. - Robert Frost

Hell is paved with good Samaritans. - William M. Holden

Wedded be thou to the hags of hell. - William Shakespeare

Tea is a religion of the art of life. - Okakura Kakuzo

An art thief is a man who takes pictures. - George Carlin

Hell hath no fury like a woman's corns. - Archie Bunker

That Meathead calls me a religious phonetic. - Archie Bunker

Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned. - Milton Friedman

Who the hell wants to be happy all the time? - Christopher Plummer

The robbed that smiles, steals something from the thief. - William Shakespeare

How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours. - Wayne Dyer

My mind is the only sanctuary that has not been stolen from me. - Christopher Paolini

Never tell anyone to go to hell unless you can make 'em go. - Bill Clinton

There is nothing more important than appearing to be religious. - Niccolo Machiavelli

If I'm going to Hell, I'm going there playing the piano. - Jerry Lee Lewis

listen; there's a hell of a good universe next door: let's go - e e cummings

We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office. - Aesop

The hell with the toothpicks. They say them things bust your emammal anyhow - Archie Bunker

I finally found out how priests get holy water. They boil the hell out of it. - Joan Rivers

There's no better book with which to defend the Bible than the Bible itself. - Dwight L. Moody

To be religious is to have a life that flows with the presence of the extraordinary. - Ann Belford Ulanov

I took a physical for some life insurance. All they would give me was fire and theft. - Milton Berle

I am the indoctrinated child of two lapsed Irish Catholics. Which is to say: I am not religious. - Meghan O'Rourke

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places. - Mark Twain

He was of the faith chiefly in the sense that the church he currently did not attend was Catholic. - Kingsley Amis

The hottest place in Hell is reserved for those who remain neutral in times of great moral conflict. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls in to line. - Lucille Ball

The infliction of cruelty with a good conscience is a delight to moralists. That is why they invented Hell. - Bertrand Russell

An angel is a spiritual creature created by God without a body for the service of Christendom and the church. - Leo Rosten

Socialism only works in two places: Heaven where they don't need it, and Hell where they already have it. - Ronald Reagan

The Muslim world is threatened by religious fanaticism. The Western world is threatened by secular fanaticism. - Dennis Prager

The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who in times of great moral crises maintain their neutrality. - Dante Alighieri

The bulletin board on the lawn of a New Jersey Church reads "We reserve the right to accept everybody." - John Kazmark

It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand. - Mark Twain

Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in Church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs. - Fred Allen

I went to a Catholic boys' school for a year, but that was to play hockey. Religion class was quite contentious for me. - Keanu Reeves

He who begins with Metaphysics will not only become confused in matters of religion, but will fall into complete infidelity. - Maimonides

We are in the world to laugh. In purgatory or in hell we shall no longer be able to do so. And in heaven it would not be proper. - Jules Renard

The Muslim Prophet Mohammed was a big believer in charity and firmly established helping those in need as a basis of the religion. - Richard Engel

Religion is something left over from the infancy of our intelligence, it will fade away as we adopt reason and science as our guidelines. - Bertrand Russell