QuotaBillsIn wine, there is truth. - Pliny the Elder
Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee
I like a wine that fights back. - John Steed
Good wine is a necessity of life. - Thomas Jefferson
Wine is my favorite 4 letter word. - Unknown
When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb
Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash
Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder. - Addison Mizner
Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown
I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown
Compromises are for relationships, not wine. - Robert S Caywood
Wine is the most civilized thing in the world. - Ernest Hemingway
Music is the wine that fills the cup of silence. - Robert Fripp
I should never have switched from Scotch to martinis. - Humphrey Bogart
Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting? - WC Fields
Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin
Some call it Cocktail Hour. To me, it's a support group. - Unknown
Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II
I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw
A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I
Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson
Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits
I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown
Too much of anything is bad. Too much of good whisky is barely enough. - Mark Twain
A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world. - Louis Pasteur
In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best
One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. - Samuel Johnson
Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx
My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown
Measure thy life by loss instead of gain, not by the wine drunk, but the wine poured forth. - Harriet King
Jameson's Irish Whiskey really does improve with age: the older I get the more I like it. - Bob Monkhouse
Wine makes a man more pleased with himself. I do not say it makes him more pleasing to others. - Samuel Johnson
They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray
Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. - WC Fields
I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright
Age is just a number. It's totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine. - Joan Collins
I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. - Hunter S Thompson
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine
Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin
The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker
A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke
Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry
A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe
Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown
NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown
The simple act of opening a bottle of wine has brought more happiness to the human race than all the collective governments in the history of earth. - Jim Harrison