#1 humor site on the 'net

Canned Cheeseburger

How to enjoy extreme situation meals

Canned Cheeseburger thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Canned Cheeseburger thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
I hid myself in food. - Gordon Ramsay

Photographing a cake can be art. - Irving Penn

Sacred cows make the best hamburger. - Mark Twain

Food tastes better when you wear it. - Erin Dealey

Patience is the secret to good food. - Gail Simmons

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life. - Oliver C. Wilson

Don't pick at your food. It won't heal. - Hawkeye Pierce

Life is too short not to order the bacon dessert. - George Takei

Rock and roll is the hamburger that ate the world. - Peter York

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27. - Clement Attlee

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy. - Amy Sedaris

Once you get rid of integrity the rest is a piece of cake. - Larry Hagman

Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese. - G K Chesterton

False Economy: using only 30 candles on her 40th birthday cake - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We take the hamburger business more seriously than anyone else. - Ray Kroc

The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb

I won't be impressed with technology until I can download food. - Unknown

I eat swiss cheese. But I only nibble on it. I make the holes bigger. - Steven Wright

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. - Steven Wright

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. - Bob Hope

My idea of baking is buying a ready-make cake mix and throwing in an egg. - Cilla Black

The best comfort food will always be greens, cornbread, and fried chicken. - Maya Angelou

A nice creamy chocolate cake does a lot for a lot of people; it does for me. - Audrey Hepburn

I gotta lose weight, Edith. I hope you remembered my diuretic cottage cheese. - Archie Bunker

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

You turn hotdogs with tongs. Don't you ever use those tongs on a hamburger. - J.B. Smoove

I always thought that bagels and lox was my soul food, but it turns out it's sushi. - Sara Sheridan

So long as you have food in your mouth, you have solved all questions for the time being. - Franz Kafka

If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world. - JRR Tolkien

I need to tone up, as I eat a lot of fast food. I love Maccy D's, Subway and Domino's. - Amy Childs

The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suits all cases. - Carl Jung

Once you have mastered a technique, you hardly need look at a recipe again, and can take off on your own. - Julia Child

Marge, I'm going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex. It's also the food preparation. - Homer Simpson

The disparity between a restaurant's price and food quality rises in direct proportion to the size of the pepper mill. - Bryan Miller

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen." - Unknown

How is it that mercury is not safe for food additives and Over the Counter drug products, but it is safe in our vaccines and dental amalgams? - Dan Burton

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo

Mushroom: 1. A motel for quickies; 2. The place where they store the school food; 3. A room that has no sides, no walls, no doors and no ceilings. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth - something very difficult for a politician. Or watch your food - just watch it, don't eat it. - Edward I Kock


Music Illusion

New Fuel Gauge

Treescape

Diamond Ring TP

Treadmill Workout

The Three Stooges In And Out Of Character

Mask Not Your Country

Sun Protection

Multi-Motor Motorcycle

Your In America

Mexican Repair Shop

You're CuTe

Don't Be A Stick In The Mud

Wake Up Alarm

Mr. Dressup II

Gangsta

Tiring Tire

Redneck Rolling Bottle Sprinkler

Transmission Line Parallel Bars

Water Skiing in Russia

Why Men Shouldn't Take Messages

Spot the Snow Leopard

Open Too Long

Rap Is Like Scissors