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Canadian Math

Disclaimer: hockey puck velocity may vary from rink to rink

Canadian Math thanks to Jerry VanHorne

In classical mechanics, linear momentum or translational momentum is the product of the mass and velocity of an object. In Canada, p=mv where p=puck, m=movement (as in towards an octopus), and v=velo city (in Newfoundland, eh)
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Hockey's my favorite sport. - Denis Leary

Hockey is the original extreme sport. - Tom Ward

Mass Psychology: Doing it the herd way - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Theoretical physics is actually philosophy. - Max Born

I don't even know what street Canada is on. - Al Capone

A child educated only at school is an uneducated child. - George Santayana

Canada is like a loft apartment over a really great party. - Robin Williams

Math is like love - a simple idea but it can get complicated. - R. Drabek

Mathematics has given economics rigor, but alas, also mortis. - Robert Heilbroner

Example is the school of mankind, and they will learn at no other. - Edmund Burke

You have to know a man awfully well in Canada to know his surname. - John Buchan

I love Canadians because I don't see very much racism in Canada. - Patti LaBelle

The older a man gets, the farther he had to walk to school as a boy. - Henry Brightman

Walking has been ridiculous in college basketball the past 15 years. - Bobby Knight

The greatest hockey player who ever lived: Bobby Orr, and I love him. - Donald S. Cherry

I've only been to these foreign countries: Canada, L.A. and Miami. - Larry the Cable Guy

I love hockey because of the respect for history and for the game itself. - George Vecsey

A thorough knowledge of the Bible is worth more than a college education. - Theodore Roosevelt

In mathematics, you don't understand things. You just get used to them. - John von Neumann

Canada is the only country founded on the relentless pursuit of the rodent. - Preston Manning

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Canada is the only country in the world that knows how to live without an identity. - Marshall McLuhan

Canada is a good country to be from. It has a gentler slower pace - it lends perspective. - Paul Anka

Canadian hockey fans... They boo me every time I go anywhere. Because I play for Team USA. - Brett Hull

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

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If I feel unhappy, I do mathematics to become happy. If I am happy, I do mathematics to keep happy. - Alfred Renyi

For the execution of the voyage to the Indies, I did not make use of intelligence, mathematics or maps. - Christopher Columbus

I love those hockey moms. You know what they say the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull is? Lipstick. - Sarah Palin

Mathematics is the only science where one never knows what one is talking about nor whether what is said is true. - Bertrand Russell

Canada has given us John Candy and Martin Short and Bill Shatner and Lord knows how many other wonderful performers. - Jamie Farr

The most painful thing about mathematics is how far away you are from being able to use it after you have learned it. - James Newman

I do not see how a man can work on the frontiers of physics and write poetry at the same time. They are in opposition. - Paul Dirac

In any world menu, Canada must be considered the vichyssoise of nations - it's cold, half-French, and difficult to stir. - Stuart Keate

A formal manipulator in mathematics often experiences the discomforting feeling that his pencil surpasses him in intelligence. - Howard Eves

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The Arc de Triomphe, the Eiffel Tower. They're monumental. They're straight out of Page 52 in your school history book. - Billy Crystal

When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me. I said, "Well, what do you need?" - Steven Wright

I love to play hide and seek with my kid, but some days my goal is to find a hiding place where he can't find me until after high school. - Unknown

If it's green, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it has numbers, it's math. If it doesn't work, it's technology. - Unknown


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