#1 humor site on the 'net

Bottle Sneakret

How to sneak a bottle into the concert

Bottle Sneakret thanks to Sandra Graber

Bottle Sneakret thanks to Sandra Graber

QuotaBills
Uniform: Sheep's clothing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The best beauty secret is sunblock. - Christie Brinkley

Self-trust is the first secret of success. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The secret of praying is praying in secret. - Leonard Ravenhill

A hair on the head is worth two on the brush. - Oliver Herford

A hair in the head is worth two in the brush. - Oliver Herford

The secret of success is consistency of purpose. - Benjamin Disraeli

Adopt the pace of nature. Her secret is patience. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Believing in yourself is the first secret to success. - Unknown

The secret to having it all is knowing you already do. - Unknown

I feel old when I see mousse in my opponent's hair. - Andre Aggassi

If you have a secret, people will sit a little bit closer. - Rob Cordry

The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you. - Denzel Washington

It is a secret worth knowing, that lawyers rarely go to law. - Moses Crowell

The secret of my success was clean living and a fast outfield. - Lefty Gomez

The sage wears rough clothing and holds the jewel in his heart. - Lao-Tzu

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. - Dorothy Parker

I have little hair because my brain is so big it pushes the hair out. - Silvio Berlusconi

If I want to knock a story off the front page, I just change my hairstyle. - Hillary Clinton

Pajamas: Items of clothing that newlyweds place beside the bed in case of fire - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If one glass of wine is good for you, just imagine what a whole bottle could do! - Unknown

A photograph is a secret about a secret. The more it tells you, the less you know. - Duane Arbus

Zest is the secret of all beauty. There is no beauty that is attractive without zest. - Christian Dior

I'm a Victoria's Secret model. It's such a secret, not even Victoria knows. - Unknown

I get more distracted by hair or a really bad wig than I do costumes any day of the week. - Colleen Atwood

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made. - Groucho Marx

One of the few articles of clothing that a man won't try to remove from a woman is an apron. - Marilyn Vos Savant

God is not a genie in a bottle, and your wish is not His command. His command better be your wish. - Mark Batterson

Music is the language of the spirit. It opens the secret of life bringing peace, abolishing strife. - Kahlil Gibran

Floordrobe: A floor littered with discarded clothes, viewed ironically as a clothing storage system - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I benefit from the Mr. Potato Head syndrome. Put a wig and a nose and glasses on me, and I disappear. - Phil Hartman

The whole secret of a successful life is to find out what it is one's destiny to do, and then do it. - Henry Ford

Nobody can fail to lose weight in the jungle, unless they've got a secret stash of pork pies somewhere. - Colin Baker

Our oldest son was trying to find himself for about a year. Then one day he got a haircut, and found himself. - Phil Callaway

The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age, which means never losing your enthusiasm. - Aldous Huxley

Men will confess to treason, murder, arson, false teeth, or a wig. How many of them will own up to a lack of humor? - Frank Colby

Her capacity for family affection is extraordinary: when her third husband died, her hair turned quite gold from grief. - Oscar Wilde

There are advantages to being President. The day after I was elected, I had my high school grades classified Top Secret. - Ronald Reagan

Anyone who practices can obtain success in yoga but not one who is lazy. Constant practice alone is the secret of success. - Svatmarama

I'm acting when I serve as a hostess, when I run my wig business. I was born to act, and life itself is the greatest part. - Eva Gabor


Bomb Squad Prank

Redneck Waterslide

Wailea Beach

Apple Art

Origin of the Whoopee Cushion

Better Lawyer

Laundry Goat

Meat Loaf

Better With A Beard

Fat Twin Sisters

Breathe in the Ocean

Tel Aviv Luxury Penthouse

Caffeine Boosters

Head Path

Proper English

Reese Witherspoon

Phones At Six

It Was A Dark And Stormy Night

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Whiskey Lurks Good

Tetris Couch

Canadian Alphabet

Love Rocks

Benadryl Cumquat