Better Lawyer

Necessity hath no law. - Oliver Cromwell

Agree, for the law is costly. - William Camden

Order is Heaven's first law. - Alexander Pope

Position is nine-tenths of the law. - Archie Bunker

Do you not know that I am above the law? - James II

We judge of man's wisdom by his hope. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Lawyers are guardians of the legal order. - Philip Wood

Law cannot persuade where it cannot punish. - Thomas Fuller

To live outside the law, you must be honest. - Bob Dylan

I'm trusting in the Lord and a good lawyer. - Oliver North

We are never to judge a philosophy by its abuse. - Augustine

Justice is a law of nature rarely found in human affairs. - Unknown

Ambition is like hunger; it obeys no law but its appetite. - H.W. Shaw

It is only shallow people who do not judge by appearances. - Oscar Wilde

I've never been in love. I've always been a lawyer. - Unknown

The innkeeper loves the drunkard, but not for a son-in-law. - Yiddish Proverb

It is a secret worth knowing, that lawyers rarely go to law. - Moses Crowell

Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it. - Dalai Lama

If you have ten thousand regulations you destroy all respect for the law. - Winston Churchill

The only stable state is the one in which all men are equal before the law. - Aristotle

I know that this defies the law of gravity, but, you see, I never studied law. - Bugs Bunny

Time is money, especially when you're talking to a lawyer or an accountant. - Joe-kster

Humour is based on a modicum of truth. Ever heard a joe-k about a father-in-law? - Dick Clark

Under the English legal system you are innocent until you are shown to be Irish. - Ted Whitehead

May you live your life as if the maxim of your actions were to become universal law. - Immanuel Kant

My mother-in-law has so many wrinkles, when she smiles she looks like a Venetian blind. - Les Dawson

I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. - Steven Wright

Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet. - Mark Twain

Law: an ordinance of reason for the common good, made by him who has care of the community. - Thomas Aquinas

You can judge your age by the amount of pain you feel when you come in contact with a new idea. - Pearl S. Buck

The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges. - Anatole France

Zymurgy’s Law of Volunteer Labour: People are always available for work in the past tense - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A lawyer is a gentleman that rescues your estate from your enemies and then keeps it to himself. - Henry P Brougham

The law was made for one thing alone - for the exploitation of those who don't understand it. - Bertoit Brecht

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I don't want a lawyer to tell me what I cannot do. I hire one to tell me how to do what I want to do. - J P Morgan

I wanted to do something nice so I bought my mother-in-law a chair. Now they won't let me plug it in. - Henny Youngman

Do not mind anything that anyone tells you about anyone else. Judge everyone and everything for yourself. - Henry James

Shakespeare said pretty well everything and what he left out, James Joyce, with a judge from meself, put in. - Brendan Behan

A lawyer's duty is to read the law well himself, then tell the people what it is, and let them act upon it. - Brigham Young

There is one kind of robber whom the law does not strike at, and who steals what is most precious to men: time. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods. - Albert Einstein

The courtrooms of America all too often have Piper Cub advocates trying to handle the controls of Boeing 747 litigation. - Warren E. Burger

Honest and peace-loving people shun the Courts and are prepared to suffer loss rather than fall into a Lawyer's clutches. - Peter De Noronha

In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. - John Adams

A nation that is afraid to let its people judge the truth and falsehood in an open market is a nation that is afraid of its people. - John F Kennedy

A judge who likes every outcome he reaches is very likely a bad judge, stretching for results he prefers rather than those the law demands. - Neil Gorsuch

Secretary: "It must be hard to lose your mother-in-law." WC Fields: "Yes it is, very hard. It's almost impossible." - WC Fields

While awaiting sentencing, I decided to give stand-up comedy a shot. The judge had suggested I get my act together, and I took him seriously. - Tim Allen

Never utter these words: 'I do not know this, therefore it is false.' One must study to know; know to understand; understand to judge. - Apothegm of Narda