Bed Friends

And so to bed. - Samuel Pepys

Envy is the companion of glory. - Latin Proverb

Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown

Every time I paint a portrait I lose a friend. - John Singer Sargent

The friendship that can cease has never been real. - St. Jerome

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat. - Erma Bombeck

After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields

Those who seek faultless friends will remain friendless. - Unknown

Your real influence is measured by your treatment of yourself. - A. Bronson Alcott

God gave us our relatives; thank God we can choose our friends. - Ethel Mumford

If I didn't have you as a mom, I'd choose you as a friend. - Unknown

The friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you. - Elbert Hubbard

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

My best friend is the man who'll get me a book I ain't read. - Abraham Lincoln

That slicker with the bedside manner needs watching. He's better! - Martin H. Fischer

Friends are lost by calling too often and by not calling often enough. - French Proverb

What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself. - Hecato

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. - Josh Billings

Bad habits are like a good bed; easy to get into but difficult to get out of. - Unknown

Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer. - Ed Cunningham

No man can be called friendless when he has God and the companionship of good books. - Elizabeth Barrett Browning

True happiness consists not in the multitude of friends, but in the worth and choice. - Ben Jonson

I can trust my friends. These people force me to examine myself, encourage me to grow. - Cher

Ladies and gentlemen are permitted to have friends in the kennel but not in the kitchen. - George Bernard Shaw

Me and my bed are perfect for each other, but my alarm clock keeps trying to break us up. - Unknown

Let Wall Street have a nightmare and the whole country has to help get them back in bed again. - Will Rogers

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

There's a thing that keeps surprising you about stormy old friends after they die: their silence. - Ben Hecht

We challenge one another to be funnier and smarter ... It's the way friends make love to one another. - Annie Gottlieb

For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

Don't make friends who are comfortable to be with. Make friends who will force you to lever yourself up. - Thomas J. Watson Sr.

As yet, Bernard Shaw hasn't become prominent enough to have any enemies, but none of his friends like him. - Oscar Wilde

Give me a Murphy bed, a Lazy Susan, a grandfather clock and a bulldog, and I will show you the meaning of comedy. - Jonathan Goldstein

I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

Don't expect your friend to be a perfect person. But help your friend to become a perfect person. That is true friendship. - Mother Teresa

Every woman's dream is that a man will take her in his arms, throw her into bed... and clean the whole house while she sleeps. - Unknown

One's life has value so long as one attributes value to the life of others, by means of love, friendship, indignation, and compassion. - Simone de Beauvoir