#1 humor site on the 'net

Bad Ass Fire Truck

Big expectations for a hot fire fighting season

Bad Ass Fire Truck thanks to Wayne Nowazek

How to fight even the biggest of forest fires

QuotaBills
Add not fire to fire. - Greek proverb

Genius is initiative on fire. - Holbrook Jackson

Blazer: A jacket that is on fire - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Love in its essence is spiritual fire. - Emanuel Swedenborg

Content is fire and social media is gasoline. - Jay Baer

People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes. - Abigail Van Buren

The inner fire is the most important thing mankind possesses. - Edith Sodergran

So comes snow after fire, and even dragons have their endings. - JRR Tolkien

By the time I have money to burn, my fire will have burnt out. - Unknown

Neither fire nor wind, birth nor death can erase our good deeds. - Buddha

The mind is not a vessel to be filled, but a fire to be kindled. - Plutarch

Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire. - William Butler Yeats

Yesterday is ashes; tomorrow wood. Only today does the fire burn brightly. - Eskimo Proverb

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl. - Dave Barry

Sleeping is my drug; my bed is my dealer; and my alarm clock is the police. - Unknown

Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice. - Ethel Merman

Pajamas: Items of clothing that newlyweds place beside the bed in case of fire - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

No amount of facts in his head can compensate for the lack of fire on his lips. - Vance Havner

As soon go kindle fire with snow, as seek to quench the fire of love with words. - William Shakespeare

Success isn't a result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire. - Arnold H Glasow

A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald, but if he has fire, women will like him. - Mae West

Some preachers ought to put more fire into their sermons or more sermons into the fire. - Vance Havner

I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place. - Steven Wright

Me and my bed are perfect for each other, but my alarm clock keeps trying to break us up. - Unknown

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. - Unknown

This momentous question, like a fire bell in the night, awakened and filled me with terror. - Thomas Jefferson

You're an old-timer if you can remember when setting the world on fire was a figure of speech. - Franklin P Jones

I don't have an alarm clock. If someone needs to wake me up, then I have my BlackBerry next to me. - Mark Zuckerberg

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. - Joan Crawford

The fire of the diamond of true identity is always there; it just needs the Master's crafting to reveal it. - Kenneth G Mills

I wanted to be the first woman to burn her bra, but it would have taken the fire department four days to put it out. - Dolly Parton

I'm not just retiring from the company, I'm also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron. - Hartman Jule

Motivation is a fire from within. If someone else tries to light that fire under you, chances are it will burn very briefly. - Stephen R. Covey

I have a microwave fireplace in my house... The other night I laid down in front of the fire for the evening in two minutes. - Steven Wright

In case of fire, don't panic. Simply flee the building with the same reckless abandon that occurs each day at quitting time. - Don Delcourt

You don't have to say everything to be a light. Sometimes a fire built on a hill will bring interested people to your campfire. - Shannon L. Alder

At fifty, the madwoman in the attic breaks loose, stomps down the stairs, and sets fire to the house. She won't be imprisoned anymore. - Erica Jong

To have a curable illness and to leave it untreated except for prayer is like sticking your hand in a fire and asking God to remove the flame. - Sandra L. Douglas

Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. - Edith Sitwell

Well, yes, I've fired a lot of people. Generally I like other people to fire, because it's always a lousy task. But I have fired many people. - Donald Trump


Calling In Sick - Snow Job for the Boss

Look At It This Way

Camouflaged Owls

Snow Geese

Quantum Physiques

Typewriter Parts

Irish Flu Shots

Hawaii Scuba Bus

Winter Blues

Pink Freud

Geriatric Flight

Chili Rub

Safety Pin Face

New York's Morning Cup of Java

Pole Position

Before Political Correctness

Tooth Loss

Organic Compromise

Classic Ballet Ad

Redneck Air Conditioning Controls

End Of World Car Sale

Digging Up A Date

Tomato Sprouts

Shuttle Bus Driver