Baby Poser

Birth patrol pills. - Archie Bunker

The Child is father of the Man. - William Wordsworth

A child's first teacher is its mother. - Peng Liyuan

A baby is an inestimable blessing and a bother. - Mark Twain

A child educated only at school is an uneducated child. - George Santayana

One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control. - Rodney Dangerfield

Never help a child with a task at which he feels he can succeed. - Maria Montessori

When I was a child, nobody died; but now it happens all the time. - Unknown

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. - Leo J Burke

My Birth Certificate is so old, it's written in Roman Numerals. - Bill Carter

No matter how bad a child is, he is still good for a tax deduction. - American Proverb

The answers you get from literature depend on the questions you pose. - Margaret Atwood

Intellectual growth should commence at birth and cease only at death. - Albert Einstein

Ma-ma does everything for the baby, who responds by saying Da-da first. - Mignon McLaughlin

A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five. - Groucho Marx

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby. - Natalie Wood

You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test. - George W. Bush

There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

As a child, my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it. - Buddy Hackett

Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born? - Benny Hill

The most important question in the world is, "Why is the child crying?" - Alice Walker

An ugly baby is a very nasty object, and the prettiest is frightful when undressed. - Queen Victoria

The firsts go away - first love, first baby, first kiss. You have to create new ones. - Sarah Jessica Parker

There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. - Walt Streightiff

We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today. - Stacia Tauscher

A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children. - Dave Barry

A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity. - Agatha Christie

Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit. - Bill Cosby

I brought children into this dark world because it needed the light that only a child can bring. - Liz Armbruster

The quickest way for a parent to get a child's attention is to sit down and look comfortable. - Lane Olinghouse

The baby bat
Screamed out in fright,
'Turn on the dark,
I'm afraid of the light.' - Shel Silverstein

Why is it that people rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the people involved. - Mark Twain

Do you think you're safe in a car with your seatbelt on? Dream on. My friend thought so. Now she's pregnant. - Anke Engelke

There's nothing that can help you understand your beliefs more than trying to explain them to an inquisitive child. - Frank A. Clark

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

One of the signs of passing youth is the birth of a sense of fellowship with other human beings as we take our place among them. - Virginia Woolf

I was forced to live far beyond my years when just a child, now I have reversed the order and I intend to remain young indefinitely. - Mary Pickford

Without this playing with fantasy no creative work has ever yet come to birth. The debt we owe to the play of the imagination is incalculable. - Carl Jung

The heart of who I am as a person and as a man is forgiveness, after forgiving my father for a lot of things that were done when I was a child. - Tyler Perry

Blessed be Providence which has given to each his toy: the doll to the child, the child to the woman, the woman to the man, the man to the devil. - Victor Hugo