#1 humor site on the 'net

As The World Turns

LP recording of our time on earth

As The World Turns thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Permanently recording our life story
LP record: long-playing; 12 or 10 inch vinyl record that spins at 33 1/3 rpm

QuotaBills
World records are only borrowed. - Unknown

Work hard, play hard, change the world. - Amazon.com Motto

Life in 2019: Living Happily Ever Laughter! - Joe-kster

Change is not merely necessary to life, it is life. - Alvin Toffler

I have found that if you love life, life will love you back. - Arthur Rubinstein

Having a soft heart in a cruel world is courage, not weakness. - Unknown

The only way to enjoy anything in this life is to earn it first. - Ginger Rogers

To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence. - Mark Twain

Talent is formed in solitude, character in the bustle of the world. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out. - Walter Winchell

Some quick advice for success in life: Don't be afraid, be amazing. - Cuthbert Soup

In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes. - Benjamin Franklin

Life doesn't require that we be the best, only that we try our best. - H. Jackson Brown Jr.

A very great part of the mischiefs that vex the world arises from words. - Edmund Burke

To the world you may be one person; but to one person you may be the world. - Dr. Seuss

My life is full of mistakes. They're like pebbles that make a good road. - Beatrice Wood

Life is never boring, but some people choose to be bored. Boredom is a choice. - Wayne W. Dyer

It's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. - Abraham Lincoln

Life without endeavor is like entering a jewel mine and coming out with empty hands. - Japanese Proverb

Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly. - Lanston Hughes

Trust only movement. Life happens at the level of events not of words. Trust movement. - Alfred Adler

Most of the change we think we see in life is due to truths being in and out of favour. - Robert Frost

If we live a monotonous life, do we get used to it and stop thinking about changing it? - Pokemon

Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity. - Martin Luther King Jr.

Life, if you're fat, is a minefield - you have to pick your way, otherwise you blow up. - Miriam Margolyes

At 20 a man thinks he can save the world. At 40 he's lucky if he can save part of his salary. - Unknown

My imagination makes me human and makes me a fool; it gives me all the world and exiles me from it. - Ursula K. Le Guin

The one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties. - Oscar Wilde

The whole trend and quality of anyone's life is determined in the long run by the choices that are made. - Norman Vincent Peale

Conquer the world by intelligence, and not merely by being slavishly subdued by the terror that comes from it. - Bertrand Russell

I won't eat anything that has intelligent life, but I would gladly eat a network executive or a politician. - Marty Feldman

Perhaps our eyes need to be washed by our tears once in a while, so that we can see life with a clearer view again. - Alex Tan

A happy life must be to a great extent a quiet life, for it is only in an atmosphere of quiet that true joy dare live. - Bertrand Russell

Our brain is mapping the world. Often that map is distorted, but it's a map with constant immediate sensory input. - E.O. Wilson

If you want something out of life you have to go out there and get it, because it is not just going to be given to you. - Kelvin Waites

When you inhale, you are taking the strength from God. When you exhale, it represents the service you are giving to the world. - B.K. Iyengar

The widening of woman's sphere is to improve her lot. Let us do it, and if the world scoff, let it scoff - if it sneer, let it sneer. - Lucy Stone

We can always choose to perceive things differently. You can focus on what's wrong in your life, or you can focus on what's right. - Marianne Williamson

Feminism isn't about making women stronger. Women are already strong. It's about changing the way the world perceives that strength. - G.D. Anderson

If it's flipping hamburgers at McDonald's, be the best hamburger flipper in the world. Whatever it is you do you have to master your craft. - Snoop Dogg


Dementia Purse

Quarantine Response

Braided Horse Tail

Government Debt

Statue Tug Of War

Kiosk Hours

Tight Fit

Life Is Beautiful

Buddha Pear

Yes!

Sunday Service Social Distancing

Mannequin Pointer

Life's Choices

Two Of Each

Napoleon

Tomorrow

You Turn

ThaiTanic

The Future of Social Media

Tartan Headphones

Husband Quarantine

Aussie Salad

Greta on Chopsticks

Darkness Eliminator