Zidane Is Fast

Tantamount: Riding a French Aunt - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The French: Germans with good food. - Fran Lebowitz

Soccer: A European warm-up exercise for rioting - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

France was a long despotism tempered by epigrams. - Thomas Carlyle

Academy: A modern school where football is taught - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Wrestlers are a bunch of wanna-be football players. - Brian Bosworth

Australian Kiss: Same as French Kiss, only down under - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Harlez Vous Francais?: Can you drive a French motorcycle? - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

To understand Europe, you have to be a genius - or French. - Madeleine Albright

Baseball is what we were, football is what we have become. - Mary McGrory

The best thing I know between France and England is the sea. - Douglas Jerrold

In France, cooking is a serious art form and a national sport. - Julia Child

As the French used to say, "the peace of resistance." - Archie Bunker

Football is a game designed to keep coal miners off the streets. - Jimmy Breslin

Mick Jagger could French-kiss a moose. He has child-bearing lips. - Joan Rivers

It is better to have died a small boy than to fumble this football. - John Heisman

England is an empire, Germany is a nation, a race, France is a person. - Jules Michelet

Football Season: The time of the year when girls whistle at men in sweaters - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There are ways of singing in English that are not just the same as in French. - Coeur de Pirate

Football Game: A sport where a spectator takes four quarters to finish a fifth - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The French invented the only known cure for dandruff. It is called the guillotine. - P G Wodehouse

If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. - Erma Bombeck

Ticket Scalper: A man who enables you to see one football game for the price of five - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

In life, as in football, you won't go far unless you know where the goalposts are. - Arnold H Glasgow

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

Football isn't a contact sport; it's a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport. - Vince Lombardi

College Professor: A man who gets what's left over after the football coach is paid off - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I asked my hairdresser what would look good on me. She says a Los Angeles Rams football helmet. - Phyllis Diller

I like spaghetti bolognese, I like baked beans on toast. I hate French food. I hate fancy food. - Simon Cowell

Never doubt the courage of the French. They were the ones who discovered that snails are edible. - Doug Larson

Football: A sport that bears the same relation to education that bullfighting does to agriculture - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Eternity: 1. The last two minutes of a football game; 2. The time between you coming and her going. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Football combines the two worst things about America: it is violence punctuated by committee meetings. - George Will

May I never be drunk enough to try to play a foosball table alone like that dude over there who actually is. - Dr. Okay Times

Malenutrition: The practice of depriving a man from food for more than a couple of hours - or during a football game - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I went to a fancy French restaurant called "Deja Vu." The headwaiter said, "Don't I know you?" - Steven Wright

Shoulder Pads: The part of a football player's uniform designed to make him look as fearsome as a female executive - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Kicking is very important in football. In fact, some of the more enthusiastic players even kick the ball, occasionally. - Alfred Hitchcock

If I were God and I were trying to create a nation that would get up the nostrils of the Englishman, I would create the French. - Julian Barnes

My whole body is a wreck. I've injured myself so many times with jujitsu, skateboarding, football. I guess I like to live hard. - Scott Caan