Winter Deflation

Weather forecast for tonight: dark. - George Carlin

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted. - Mae West

Where does the white go when the snow melts? - Hugh Kieffer

Room service - don't send up any more ice. - WC Fields

An old man in love is like a flower in winter. - Portuguese Proverb

You can't get too much winter in the winter. - Robert Frost

If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet? - Steven Wright

She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake. - Margot Asquith

Climate is what we expect. Weather is what we get. - Mark Twain

In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Some say the world will end in fire, some say in ice. - Robert Frost

The groundhog said six more weeks of winter so I ate him. - Wile E. Coyote

Never take a job where winter winds can blow up your pants. - Geraldo Rivera

The coldest winter I ever spent was summer in San Francisco. - Mark Twain

I don't jog. It makes the ice jump right out of my glass. - David Lee Roth

I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass. - David Lee Roth

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

It is best to read the weather forecasts before we pray for rain. - Mark Twain

If you're already walking on thin ice, you might as well dance. - Proverb

She walked across the ballroom as if she were trudging through deep snow. - Noel Coward

Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine. - Anthony J. D'Angelo

Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice. - Ethel Merman

As soon go kindle fire with snow, as seek to quench the fire of love with words. - William Shakespeare

It is only in sorrow bad weather masters us; in joy we face the storm and defy it. - Amelia Barr

Sun salutations can energize and warm you, even on the darkest, coldest winter day. - Carol Krucoff

I don't make plans, because life is short and unpredictable - much like the weather. - Al Roker

In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus

I like ice hockey. No one is ever going to ask me to write about that as a metaphor for life. - Steven Pinker

If Springtime crawls out of the wild mouths of flowers, then surely, Winter crawls out of mine. - Cecilia Llompart

It's not my fault I was dragged out of my house by a mob and forced to predict the weather. - Punxsutawney Phil

Growing up, I'd just be at home, playing tennis, spending my allowance on an ice-cream truck. - Venus Williams

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain. - Robert Frost

When I was in boy scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle. A little old lady had to help me across the street. - Steven Wright

The only thing more depressing than another six weeks of winter would be having to spend them in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania. - Unknown

Life is no different than the weather. Not only is it unpredictable, but it shows us a new perspective of the world every day. - Suzy Kassem

I love cookies baking. During the winter, they have these candles that smell like cookies, and I always buy like a hundred of them. - Jared Padalecki

The trouble with weather forecasting is that it's right too often for us to ignore it, and wrong too often for us to rely on it. - Patrick Young

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant; if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome. - Anne Bradstreet

My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy your ice cream while it's on your plate - that's my philosophy. - Thornton Wilder